- How’s his handwriting?
- Did he write on the back sides of pages to save trees?
- Does he know how to use a computer?
- If he wrote this on the computer what font would he use? (Papyrus, that fucker).
- Is he really “relaxed” about his future if he’s writing lovesick letters?
- Can we have a copy?
- Did he spell “Adnan Januzaj” correctly?
- How far into his plan to emotionally torment Juan Mata did he get?
- What kind of paper did he use?
- What kind of “forensic analysis” did he do?
- How would he pronounce Daley Blind’s last name?
- José, you there?
- José, you okay buddy?
Photo via AP