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Louisville Fan Punches Kentucky Fan Hooked Up To Dialysis Machine
Remember how John Calipari said fans take the UK-UL rivalry more seriously than the players? This is exactly what he's talking about....

LeBron Dislocates Ring Finger
James injured his left ring finger during last night's loss to Indiana. The team isn't talking, but one report says it could be dislocated. This is your cue to make bad jokes. [ESPN]...

John Calipari Reminds You That You Care More About The Kentucky-Louisville Rivalry Than His Players Do
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Not only aren't they from the Bluegrass State, but they don't stay there long enough to care...

Cat Gets Loose During Basketball Game, Evades Dog Mascot
Israel is full of stray cats, so pure numbers say it was a matter of time before one of them ended up on the court during a Maccabi Tel Aviv game. The cat panicked, unable to handle the transition game and the slippery floor, and was set upon by Donny the Dog, Maccabi's mascot. Kitty escaped, thou...

Kansas State Has Some Bullshit Excuse For How They Learned About Jamar Samuels's Ineligibility
So I'm going to tell you a story, and you tell me if it sounds made-up, because Kansas State is sticking to it and saying it's definitely not made up....

Sports Scores Could Soon Be Coming To Siri
"Siri, what's the Avalanche score?"...

It's Good That The NFL Is Punishing Washington And Dallas For Breaking No Rules
I'm glad, gosh darn it, that NFL owners voted 29-0 to enforce salary cap penalties against the Redskins and Cowboys for spending a lot of money in the uncapped 2010 season. It's a good thing that the league is coming down hard, $36 million for DC and $10 million for Dallas, on two of the most powerf...

How The Broncos Got Peyton Manning
It came down to Arizona, Tennessee and Denver. Those three teams, sans Miami, that everyone expected to be on Peyton Manning's radar were the three finalists in Manning's search for a new team. Manning wanted a chance to win, but more than that, he wanted to go where he would have friends. Ken Whise...

Rebounderz Would Like You To Know That Joba Chamberlain Did Not Get Injured At Rebounderz, But At A Non-Rebounderz Brand Trampoline Arena
Today we received a letter, from Al Palladino, Sr. VP at Rebounderz® Franchise and Development, Inc. Mr. Palladino takes issue with our headline last week that implied Joba Chamberlain injured himself at one of the six Rebounderz® facilities in Florida....

Cricketer Takes 86 MPH Ball To The Crotch, Cracking His Cup
Kane Williamson was a hero on the fifth day of New Zealand's test against South Africa, and not just because he recorded a century and salvaged a draw after entering the afternoon facing down an enormous deficit. Early on he took a ball directly to the groin, a delivery that split his cup—or as pe...

Racist Tweets About Fabrice Muamba Get Student 56 Days In Jail
When Bolton's Fabrice Muamba collapsed and his heart stopped for more than an hour, onlookers could only pray. The professionals could do more, defibrillating his heart back into action and saving his life. Meanwhile, a 21-year-old Welsh asshole was merrily Tweeting away that he hoped Muamba was dea...

If You Think Andrew Bogut Is Injury-Prone, He Thinks You're "Uneducated"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Bogut, out for the season, says it's just a chain of freak accidents....

The Brooklyn Dodgers Did Not Mind If You Photographed Their Pubes And Asses
At least for the A's and Mariners in Tokyo, Opening Day is early Wednesday morning. With the return of baseball comes the return of casual nudity, an inescapable fact of locker rooms since the days before the West Coast had teams....

The Broncos Took A Smaller Trade Haul Just To Make Tim Tebow Happy
We learned two things about Tim Tebow and Jacksonville today. First, that he pronounces his hometown team's name "Jagwires," and second, that it's absolutely true the Broncos let him choose his destination. He chose the Jets, and the Broncos shipped him to Jersey, despite the Jaguars offering a bett...

Sean Payton Asks Bill Parcells To Coach The Saints For A Year
ESPN reports that Sean Payton has floated the idea that Bill Parcells could be the Saints' placeholder coach while Payton serves his one-year suspension. Parcells is something of a mentor to Payton, so the two have been talking a lot recently, with Payton needing a big Tuna-y shoulder to cry on. But...

White Basketball Player Compared To White Basketball Player
George Karl, on Kevin Love: "I think we used to call him a poor man's Larry Bird. I think you can take 'poor man' off that comparison now."...

Vanilla Ice Will Perform At The Timberwolves Game Friday
This is a special moment for the white people of Minnesota. Vanilla Ice, fresh off his eighth studio album, will perform at halftime of the Wolves/Celtics game this Friday. I don't know his set list, but I'm sure he'll play all your favorite. [NBA.com]...

The Marlins' Home Run Sculpture Is Alive
When I was young, the Mets tricked me into rooting for them solely by that giant fiberglass apple. I couldn't wait for Howard Johnson or Kevin McReynolds to hit a home run, just so I could see the apple rise out of the similarly comically oversized top hat. So maybe, at 28, I'm no longer in the de...

Kimbo Slice Lands A Very Suspicious Knockout
Kimbo Slice, former bouncer, former internet streetfighter, former MMA sensation and washout, is now trying his hand at boxing. And while one doesn't usually start a successful boxing career at 38 years of age, Slice has gone undefeated in three matches by being matched against even more unlikely...