barryap Page 600 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dez Bryant Could Learn A Lesson
Travis Ivey didn't seem to mind carrying six sets of pads after Dolphins practice yesterday. Alternate caption: the NFL takes steps to prevent neck and spinal injuries. [Photo: AP]...

Cheez Doodle Inventor Mourned By One Solitary Sportswriter
The inventor of the Cheez Doodle died last week. Stephen A. Smith was seen laying a single orange rose on his grave....

Here's Karen Sypher, Seconds Away From Blowing Her Lawyer
Sypher's former lawyer Dana Kolter testified that they had an "intimate relationship" before he threatened to sue Rick Pitino as part of her extortion plan. Jurors were then shown photographs of Sypher and Kolter engaging in oral sex....

Grounds Crew Sets Fire To Baseball Field To Dry It
"It seemed like a good idea at the time" is a phrase that doesn't bode well. But rarely has there been so obviously not a good idea as burning a baseball field with diesel fuel to dry it out after it rains....

Weekend Winner: Media Members In Better Shape Than Albert Haynesworth
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like various DC-area media members, who took a shot at completing the Redskins' conditioning test that the disgruntled Haynesworth has been unable to pass....

Does Kim Kardashian Know About This?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Icky Icky Blowjob News From The Pitino Extortion Trial
Let's check back in with Matt Jones of Kentucky Sports Radio, and today's oral sex update — featuring visual aids!...

Private Stache: John-John And The Say Hey Kid Share A Tender Moment
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Julio Mora: 22-Star Recruit
So, glitch on Rivals.com, or is Julio Mora the football-playing reincarnation of Shiva himself? [EDSBS]...

Father Of The Year Makes Daughter Pose With Barracuda That Ripped Her Flesh Open
This happy fellow is Rob Parker, with a 42-inch long barracuda that he caught. This traumatized girl is his 14-year-old daughter, who was the bait. He made sure to get this photo before they went to the hospital. (Bloody, NSFW-ish photo inside.)...

Pudgy Philly Puker To The Pokey
Matthew Clemmens will spend 60 to 90 days in jail, and do community service (the judge suggested cleaning bathrooms at Citizens Bank Park) after pleading guilty to assault, harassment and disorderly conduct. We're awaiting comment from crazy uncle Dave. [Inquirer]...

LeBron Jersey Guy Speaks, Confirming Everything We Thought About Him
Matthew Bellamy is back for his third day of Internet fame, doing local news and posting abrasive Facebook messages. We've been told not to use the word "douchebag" on the site, but...I don't know how to finish that sentence....

Final Jeopardy Exposes One Poor Woman Who Knows Nothing About Sports
It was a sports question for Final Jeopardy last night! How do you think you'll do? Better than Meg, probably. The full question is after the jump, but rest assured, the answer is not the Jacksonville Panthers....

Raul Ibanez's Hitting Makes Another Philly Fan Cry
But this time it's tears of joy for a girl who caught his home run ball, not tears of "we're paying him how much next year?"...

Last Night's (And Every Night's) Winner: Soccer Players Who Don't Live In North Korea
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like World Cup squads not from secretive despotic nations, who probably weren't subjected to a six-hour public humiliation upon their return from South Africa like the North Koreans were....

Tan, Large-Breasted Brazilian Runs On The Field
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tim Tebow Rich In Spirit, Actual Money
The Broncos inked their 4-snaps-a-game QB of the future to 5 years, $33 million (max) — $8.7 million guaranteed. That's a lot of tithing....

Attention Nationals Fans: You Don't Deserve Stephen Strasburg (Disappointed Newlywed Update)
I don't mean that in some kind of larger, cosmic sense. I just mean that if you came out to the ballpark Tuesday, expecting to see Strasburg pitch, the team doesn't owe you anything after scratching him from his start....

The LeBron Jersey Guy From The Indians Game Speaks!
Matt Bellamy, who riled up an entire city, says he'd move to Florida too if he could find a way. But the siren song of Sandusky is too strong! [Cleveland Frowns]...

Another Stupid Piece Of News About Stupid Brett Favre That's Just So Stupid
I hate writing this stuff, but the numbers show that you people care. So help stop the cycle, and don't click on this post....