billyhaisley Page 68 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Chaco Giménez Shoots From Goddamn Jupiter, Scores
If Alessandro Florenzi’s wondergoal in September came from Mars, Chaco Giménez’s strike from even further out can only be described as originating from the next planet back....
![Former British Olympian And Diehard Arsenal Fan Did Not React Well To Yesterday's Loss [Update: This Didn't Happen]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/mw6anxnnu0dvkfwaz6cl.jpg)
Former British Olympian And Diehard Arsenal Fan Did Not React Well To Yesterday's Loss [Update: This Didn't Happen]
Update [11:01 a.m.]: Turns out, the tweeted picture showing the remote in the TV was a joke and not actually a picture of Sotherton’s TV. Sorry for the error. The original post is below....
Barcelona Beat Arsenal Because They Have Lionel Messi
Okay, so it wasn’t just because Barcelona had Lionel Messi and Arsenal didn’t that the reigning Champions League title holders beat Arsenal today, even if the Argentine did account for both goals in the likely tie-deciding 2-0 scoreline. Unlike some of his most transcendent performances—like, say, h...
Stupid Little Piece Of Metal Bounces Valencia Youth Team From Tournament
Valencia and Chelsea met today in the UEFA Youth League, which is basically the Kiddie Champions League. The Round of 16 match came down to penalties, and Chelsea were declared winners after scoring all five of their spot kicks. Problem is, Valencia never actually missed any of their penalties, eith...
Carlos Tévez Breaks Goalkeeper's Jaw With A Flying Knee To The Face
Now this isn’t as bad as the last time we saw Carlos Tévez breaking bones on a soccer pitch, seeing as that shin-snapper was on account of a horrible and late tackle while this jaw-smasher looks like a complete accident, but this is a streak Tévez probably doesn’t want to extend. Here’s the video:...
The Manchester United Backroom Power Struggle Theory We Desperately Hope Is True
There’s simply never enough intrigue and entertainment to be had from Manchester United to fully sate our appetite. Either they’re crushing all opponents at home and abroad, as they did during Alex Ferguson’s tenure, or they’re shitting all over themselves, the way they have in the few years since S...
Dimitri Payet Is Still An Animal
This isn’t even a dedicated Dimitri Payet individual highlight video and yet it’s still composed almost entirely of West Ham’s superstud going all best mode all over Blackburn in the FA Cup this weekend. And that’s because any time the Hammers do something cool, you can bet Payet will be at the cent...
Sorry, Edin Džeko, But The Post Can't Explain How You Missed That Wide-Open Net
“Post, baby, how are you gonna do me like that?” Roma’s Edin Džeko appears to whisper to the goal’s woodwork after his horrendous miss. “You know I love you, Edin,” the post probably responded, “but that’s all on you.”...
Can A Referee Get Sent Off By A Red Card? One Player Investigates
Trabzonspor defender Salih Dursun is a man of principle. Entirely dissatisfied with the quality of refereeing on display in a match against Galatasaray, he decided to take action....
Fifth-Division English Team Orchestrates Ornate Free-Kick Routine That Goes Exactly Nowhere
It’s not surprising that, deep down in England’s fifth division and without a David Beckham-like free kick specialist to whip one into the top corner, a team like Cheltenham Town would resort to trickeration to fool the goalkeeper on this set play. It’s just as unsurprising, then, what ultimately ca...
Deadspin Up All Night: Like A Child On A Big Wheel
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Till next time....
Aritz Aduriz Thumps The Bejesus Out Of Ball, Scores From Way Too Far Out
If you ever wanted to know how hard one could kick a soccer ball and yet still maintain the necessary control to steer it goalwards, this volleyed goal Athletic Club’s Aritz Aduriz just scored is a good case study:...
![Soccer Player Gets His Shin Snapped In Nasty Slide Tackle Collision [Kind Of Gross]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/alwgqsuyupk4dtrxflyi.gif)
Soccer Player Gets His Shin Snapped In Nasty Slide Tackle Collision [Kind Of Gross]
It seems like we see one of these at least once every couple months: two players converging on a ball, one going for the slide while the other keeps a foot in to scoop the ball away, and the latter coming out the other side with a flapping tibia. You probably don’t want to see this, but here’s a gif...
Robin van Persie Singing R. Kelly In His Luxurious Van Is What The Good Life Looks Like
Here’s Robin van Persie, proving that the tradition of tunelessly belting out your favorite songs while riding along in cars is a phenomenon that spans the globe. What he lacks in vocal quality he more than makes up for in song choice, lyrical knowledge, and commitment to really going for it. Props....
Julian Draxler Clowns The Shit Out Of Gent's Whole Defense
Here you have basically Gent’s entire defense getting humiliated by Wolfsburg’s Julian Draxler. One center back gifts Draxler the ball on a terrible back pass, his partner scoots over to confront the attacker only to get nutmegged, and before the right back can slide tackle the ball away, Draxler fl...
Where Does Future Go Now?
In explaining Outkast’s often radical shifts in sound, style, and subject matter between albums, André 3000 has described those transformations as the natural result of the two- to three-year breaks he and his partner, Big Boi, would take between projects, wherein both rappers would live their lives...
Barcelona Take A Penalty The Normal Way, And Of Course Miss It
What some people who don’t pay close attention to the team may have missed regarding Barcelona’s trick penalty play this weekend is that, while primarily driven by a desire to do cool shit, it was also probably a reaction to the team’s general penalty woes this season. And so it was no surprise when...
Russian Soccer Player Trolls Turkish Opponents With Vladimir Putin Shirt
Russia and Turkey aren’t on the best of terms right now, for lots of complicated reasons. Playing off these tensions yesterday was Lokomotiv Moscow’s Dmitri Tarasov, who revealed a Vladimir Putin shirt underneath his jersey during his team’s Europa League match against Turkish club Fenerbahçe....
Cristiano Ronaldo Has Some Thoughts On Soccer, Friendship, And Trick Penalty Kicks
Barcelona did something really fun and cool last weekend. Well, they did many fun and cool things, but the most memorable and somewhat controversial thing was Lionel Messi’s penalty fake-out. So when Cristiano Ronaldo took the podium today ahead of Real Madrid’s Champions League match tomorrow, it w...
Malaysian Wizard Smashes In Magic-Guided Free Kick Goal
There’s only one rational explanation for the insane swerve and dip Penang’s Mohd Faiz Subri puts on this ball that allows it to fly every which way, completely bamboozling the keeper, before hitting the side of the net from a distance and angle where it should be nigh-impossible to score from: magi...