dashiell-bennett-old Page 54 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cardinals Bullpen Fixes John Smoltz In Five Minutes
Two weeks ago, John Smoltz left Boston a washed up failure. Then one bullpen session with the Cardinals and suddenly he's a future Hall of Famer again. All because his teammates figured out what Boston coaches couldn't....

Dirk Nowitzki's Possibly Pregnant Lady Friend Gets Very Real Jail Time
Cristal Taylor was sentenced to four years in prison for violating her probation, which means Dirk Nowitzki's love child (if it indeed exists) could be born in jail. That kid's going to have a story to tell. [Post-Disptach/Blogitude]...

Delaware Loses Gambling Lawsuit, Also Fails To Cover
A Federal Appeals court sided with major sports leagues and struck down Delaware's plan to offer sports betting this fall. The integrity of sports is saved! Isn't that wonderful?...

Everything Is Not Super Cool For Michael Beasley
It seems the tattoo and dime bag photo of Michael Beasley was just the tip of his breakdown-filled weekend that started with some depressing Twitter messages and ended with him in rehab....

Favre-esque Goat Led To Slaughter In Trunk Of A Car
Mechanics in Minnesota were slightly alarmed this weekend when a woman came in for a new fan belt and then announced that she had a live goat—that was also a effigy of Brett Favre—in her trunk....

Cowboys Stadium Offers Valuable Seating Behind This Brick Wall
We've already covered the new Cowboys Stadium's opulent luxury, from the $40 million scoreboard to the $60 pizzas. How about $75 seats where you can only see one-third of the playing field? Thank you, Jerry Jones for all your blessings!...

Kansas State Blogger Knows A Lot About Hating Kansas State
The Wichita Eagle hired a new writer to obsessively blog about Kansas State athletics. Unfortunately, some Wildcat fans have a problem with the fact that he's actually a Kansas grad. But at least he has experience badmouthing Manhattan!...

Meet Crusher, Nightmare Ant's Crustacean Relation
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Does Fantasy Football Insurance Signal The End Of Days?
Fantasy sports have crept their way into every aspect of our sporting lives, but we have finally crossed the line from mania into madness. When you can buy injury insurance for your fantasy football players, we're through the looking glass....

Awesome Videos Of Animals Playing Sports
Animals are just like us....except they're not. That's why it's hilarious when they act like humans. Seriously, what are they thinking!? Here's a completely random collection of adorable animals adorably playing human sports. Because it's Saturday and you love it.......

Is The Yankees-Red Sox Rivalry 2004 All Over Again?
The Sox were walloped last night, leaving them 7.5 games out of first and looking for all the world to be at the mercy of the division champion Yankees. So does Boston have New York right where they want them?...

Kenny Mayne, Hurricane Refugee?
Is Bristol sending anchors to Bermuda for weather reports? "It was something to behold. I've never been in a hurricane before," said Kenny Mayne, 50, of Connecticut, a vacationer who hopes to head back to the U.S. on Sunday." [AP]...

Indiana To Make Nice With Bobby Knight
Bobby Knight will be inducted into the Indiana University Hall of Fame, less than 10 years after he was given the boot for yelling at kids. That should be a fun ceremony, huh?...

A's Pitcher Is Latest Member Of The Sadness Brigade
Justin Duchscherer has been on rehab since March with a hip injury. Now, he's shut down for the rest of the year with "a very treatable form of clinical depression." The treatment is "not playing for the A's." [SF Chronicle]...

Did Lou Holtz Just Say That Notre Dame Will Play For The BCS Title?
Yes. Yes, he did. He doesn't think they are the second-best team in the country, but they have the "best chance" to run the table and face Florida for all the marbles. The infuriating part is that he's right....

New Cubs Owners Will Probably Fix That
The Chicago Cubs are officially sold (finally) to the Ricketts family. Meanwhile, Derek Lee's helmet becomes a metaphor of a fading season. Even the logo can't hold its head up high. [WSJ/The CMSB]...

Cowboys' Massive New Stadium Not Big Enough To Play Football In
Jerry Jones (and Texas taxpayers) spent $1.2 billion constructing an opulent state-of-the-art multi-use arena that's perfect for concerts, soccer matches, trade shows, Promise Keepers rallies, and even football games—provided that you don't allow either team to punt....

Rockies Fans Will Never Forget What's-His-Name
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Miniature Spring-Loaded Doll Is Jason Giambi's Only Legacy
Hey Oakland fans. Don't forget that tonight is Jason Giambi bobblehead night. You remember him, right? The guy your team unceremoniously cut two weeks ago?...

Jim Rice Doesn't Like Lazy Longhairs Who Ruined Baseball
Big league Hall of Famer Jim Rice opened the World Series for Little Leaguers with a fiery speech that even the grumpiest of grumpy old men could appreciate. The message: Don't look up to today's players because they're all bums....