dashiell-bennett-old Page 72 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hockey Insanely Popular (For Just One Night)
Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals was the most-watched NHL game in 36 years. So maybe when the league starts up again in four months, some of those people 8 million people will remember it exists! [LiveFeed]...
College Baseball Fans Not Used To Being On TV
Mike Irwin of KFSM in Fayetteville would just like to talk about Arkansas baseball, but some slack-jawed SEC fans just can't resist a chance to be on the teevee. Get your hands off him, you damn dirty apes!...
Nebraska Wrestling Fiasco Makes Everyone Look Like Di... Jerks
"Outside The Lines" took a closer look at Nebraska's wrestling program (spoiler: it's corrupt) after last year's uncomfortable gay porn scandal, and somehow everyone involved ends up looking like the bad guy. Go figure!...
Michael Phelps' Life Is A Whimsical Morality Tale
Michael Phelps has "written" a children's book called How to Train with a T. Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals. Life lessons include strip club tipping etiquette and when to check-raise on Jacks or better before the flop. [Canadian Press]...
Phil Jackson: Greatest Coach Ever or Luckiest Schlub Of All Time?
Phil Jackson now has more NBA titles than any coach in NBA history—so he's the best coach in NBA history, right? Or could a diaper-wearing monkey win six titles with Michael Jordan on his team? Fight!...
Plaxico Burress Saga Will Never End
Remember this guy! Captain Sweatpants? Ringing any bells? Well, you may have assumed that he was already in jail or worse (the CFL), but his trial hasn't even started yet. And now it won't until 2010! Did someone say J-E-T-S?...
Kidnappers Take Yorvit Torrealba's Son, Mock His Batting Average
All is well now that Yorvit Torrealba's son has been rescued from kidnappers in Venezuela and brought to the United States, but the hardest part of the boy's ordeal was trying defend Dad's .220 batting average to his captors....
Laker Riots Go Off Without A Hitch
Store fronts smashed? Check. Car windows stomped on? Done. Shoe store looted? You betcha. Trash cans thrown at cops? Absolutely. It's not an official championship until your downtown gets roughed up a little bit, am I right, Los Angeles?...
Depressed Urban Zone Saved By Valiant Sports Team
All of Pittsburgh's troubles as a shrunken post-war manufacturing center are over now that the city has its third Stanley Cup championship and its second major sports title this year. Detroit, sadly, will be boarded up and shipped to Borneo....
Hines Ward Slowly Turning Into Bill Cosby
From his interview on NFL Live today. If this guy tries to sell you Jell-O Pudding, just smile politely and slowly back away. [ESPN]...
NHL Season Just Might End Tonight
Here we are. Game 7. Should I spend the next few paragraphs trying to regurgitate as many clichés as I can about the finality of the ultimate do-or-die scenario or just show you a picture of Greg Ostertag on skates?...
Epic Rant Exposes Dark Side Of Houston Cougar Baseball
There are few things people enjoy more than listening to an angry parent complain about their kid's lack of playing time, but when it's a single-page, 16,000-word website with lots of CAPS LOCK, that's a different story....
Awesome Boyfriend Ties Kids Up In Garage So He Can Enjoy The Game In Peace
Dilemma: You want to see the big game, but your girlfriend wants you to babysit. You could listen to the game on radio—or you could tie the kids up, leave them in the garage, and hit the bar....
Cleveland's Flock Of Seagulls Scores Another Hit
Everyone said Eric Wedge was crazy to train wild birds to chase down baseballs in the outfield and distract opposing outfielders. Well, who's the crazy one now, huh? Indians/Birds 1, Royals 0....
Falcons Officially Release Michael Vick
I don't understand. Did he do something wrong? [ESPN]...
Racism Charge Rocks(?) NASCAR
Bryan Berry, the crew chief for Nationwide Series driver Brendan Gaughan, was suspended after an incident in last Saturday night's race where he allegedly yelled a racial slur at driver Marc Davis. Are you stunned yet?...
Jeter Listens To Critics, Dies In A Fire
Jeter, a five-year-old Great Pyrenees dog, saved his owners' life by alerting them to a fire (so clutch!), but then needlessly ran back into the burning home and perished. Well, his range always was an issue. [Dayton Daily News]...
Tony Parker Needs New Defensive Help
Like many rich people, Tony Parker's house is filled with valuable commodities. Or it was, until the security guard hired to protect said valuables decided to steal some and sell them on Craigslist instead....
Nicklas Lidstrom's Busted Ballsack And Other Tales Of NHL Woe
If Detroit captain Nicklas Lidstrom looked a little sluggish at times during this Stanley Cup Finals, he has a very, very, very good excuse. He suffered a "nearly catastrophic" testicle injury in the Conference Finals. Now how do you feel?...
Steve Nash Auditions For His Next Job
No one knows how many miles Steve Nash has left on his little Canadian legs, but if he's looking to break into the late-night TV comedy game, his first test for his second career went fairly well....