drewmagary Page 46 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: San Diego Chargers
Some people are fans of the San Diego Chargers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the San Diego Chargers. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: New Orleans Saints
Some people are fans of the New Orleans Saints. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New Orleans Saints. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Pitchers Will Always Suck At Hitting
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering casual fans, racist neighbors, old porn, and more....
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Carolina Panthers
Some people are fans of the Carolina Panthers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Carolina Panthers. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
A List Of Things Old People Are Pussies About
Recently a woman eating at a North Carolina McDonald's found a butter swastika on the inside of her bun. Now, you might think that we are all defiantly anti-swastika out there, but some of the comments on a news story about the incident proved otherwise, including one that concluded with the foll...
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Some people are fans of the Tampa Bay Bucs. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tampa Bay Bucs. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Atlanta Falcons
Some people are fans of the Atlanta Falcons. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Atlanta Falcons. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Indianapolis Colts
Some people are fans of the Indianapolis Colts. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Indianapolis Colts. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Freelancing Sucks
You may have heard by now about Sports on Earth, the joint venture between MLB and USA Today that "laid off" a bunch of writers earlier in the week. Although the term "laid off" is a bit dicey: Technically speaking, the site only had a few full-time employees to begin with. Everyone else who wrote f...
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Houston Texans
Some people are fans of the Houston Texans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Houston Texans. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Kids Today Are So Much Better With Computers Than You Were
Your letters:...
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Jacksonville Jaguars
Some people are fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Tennessee Titans
Some people are fans of the Tennessee Titans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tennessee Titans. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
NFL Writers Just Can't Stop Marveling At Horseshit Contract Numbers
So Andy Dalton agreed to a contract extension with the Bengals, and even though the details of that deal have yet to be released, there was no shortage of football types gladly passing along the numbers as if they were real. Here: ...
Why Your Classic Children's Television Program Sucks: <em>Saved By The Bell</em>
Time for another look at the awful children’s programming you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours. Previous installments in this series can be found here. ...
Asshole Cannot Find Pen, Writes Entire <em>NYT</em> Trend Piece About It
Even by the standards of fake trend pieces in the The New York Times, today's column in about "The Demise of the Pen" in—where else?—the fashion and style section is exceptionally breathtaking in its presumptuousness. Join me now and marvel as writerer Nick Bilton turns a moment of sheer banality i...
Don't Cut Your Hamburgers In Half
Before we get to the Funbag, you should know that very soon, it's going to be time for the 32-part satanic incantation of our WHY YOUR TEAM SUCKS NFL previews. So much sucking to do! So if your team sucks (and I do mean your team; don't be the asshole Redskins fan who writes in to bitch about the ...
The Hater’s Guide To Derek Jeter
I missed the All-Jeter Game last night but I’m told it was an emotional Jeterball game in which Derek Jeter jetered a few hits and saved 12 babies that fell from the stands and mowed the outfield so that you could see a crucifix pattern in the grass. There was also a small Jeterversy in which Adam ...
Would LeBron Still Be In Miami If The Heat Had Won Their Third Title?
I started drinking coffee a year ago so I could wean myself off of Coke Zero, and the main thing I've learned in that time is that coffee makes you a complete asshole. I get all pissy now when I haven't had coffee. I get all pissy when I've had too much coffee. I get pissy if I'm having coffee,...
Down With America's Kid-Competition Complex
I was at a parent's night at my kid's school a couple of years ago—one of those things where you go to the school at night to meet the kid's teacher and eat a cookie and listen as the teacher tells you all the shit they do in class every day, and then you nod your head in approval. "Ah, yes. MUSIC...