Sam Eifling

12/12/14

Thank God That Cardinals-Rams Game Finally Shut Up And Died

Jim Nantz earned his per diem Thursday tonight when he diagnosed, during the final moments of the drudgery that…

12/11/14

Soccer Player Struck By Lightning, Thought Dead, Says He Survived

Joao Contreras Fuentes is either one lucky son of a bitch or tops on God's shit list, take your pick. He was playing…

12/11/14

Here's An Oregon Coach's Embarrassing Story About Marcus Mariota

Scott Frost's address at the Frank Broyles Award ceremony, where he was a finalist, had an obviously high bullshit…

11/8/14

Two Fumbles In Final Moments Doom No. 3 Auburn

Auburn, so routinely a team of preposterous miracles, has just managed to bumble its way to a come-from-behind loss…

11/8/14

Figure Skaters Crash Into Each Other's Faces; One Later Busts Ass

At the Lexus Cup of China, the International Skating Union's Grand Prix of Figure Skating, there was a real…

11/8/14

Baylor Wins In Norman For The First Time As Sooners Fans Lament

Baylor kicked the unholy dogshit out of Oklahoma today, a turn of affairs that many Sooners fans, raised to…

11/6/14

Disneyfied NFL Logos Are The 2014est Thing Of 2014

Here's some news from the Internet. [Designer] has reimagined all [30-some] logos of [powerful sporting league]…

11/6/14

Leah Still Reminds Us What A Bullshit Deal Childhood Cancer Is

The NFL Network (and, evidently, enormous caterpillars with human faces) have identified the sugary-awful…

6/3/14

Heartland Little League, All Knotted Up

Midwestern Little League is effing intense, you guys.

6/3/14

On The Underrated Sublimity Of Throwing Your Miserable Guts Up

I come to sing the praises of a good, hard puke.

6/3/14

O.C.P. Now Stands For 'Opening Crap Pitch'

RoboCop threw out the ceremonial first pitch in Detroit today, and it was only marginally better than his latest…

5/26/14

The Mets Can't Hit And Can't Pitch But They Sure Can Fire People

The Mets made a rare double-switch today when they released 11-year veteran pitcher Jose Valverde and axed their…

5/26/14

The Grizzlies' Front Office Is A Dysfunctional Zoo Of Obtuseness

The briefly open relationship between the Memphis Grizzlies and head coach Dave Joerger reset curiously this week…

5/26/14

Why Nicolas Mahut Would Prefer Questions In French

Your moment of Zen today from the French Open. If you have details on the alleged reporter who was thinking up these…

5/26/14

North Korea Is Another Year Closer To Soccer World Domination

On the eve of the World Cup, North Korea's FIFA ranking is holding steady at 137, which sounds pretty bad until you…

1/23/14

The West Is OKC's Until Kevin Durant Says Otherwise

In the four weeks since Russell Westbrook's arthroscopic surgery, the Oklahoma City Thunder has fallen from 23-5…

1/22/14

Bobby Fulton, half of the old pro wrestling duo the Fantastics, says he might go blind: "I started thinkin' about all the times I've been hit in the head with chairs and took it like a man." He's crowd-funding money for eye surgery. [Indiegogo]

1/22/14

Ex-Cowboys DT Josh Brent Guilty Of Intoxication Manslaughter

A jury found Josh Brent guilty today of intoxication manslaughter for the 2012 high-speed accident that killed his…

1/22/14

Here Comes The Federer-Nadal To Possibly End All Federer-Nadals

Maybe every Federer-Nadal is a Federer-Nadal for the ages, and when we look back we'll marvel at our luck that these…

Sam Eifling's posts

Thank God That Cardinals-Rams Game Finally Shut Up And Died

Soccer Player Struck By Lightning, Thought Dead, Says He Survived

Here's An Oregon Coach's Embarrassing Story About Marcus Mariota

Two Fumbles In Final Moments Doom No. 3 Auburn

Figure Skaters Crash Into Each Other's Faces; One Later Busts Ass

Baylor Wins In Norman For The First Time As Sooners Fans Lament

Disneyfied NFL Logos Are The 2014est Thing Of 2014

Leah Still Reminds Us What A Bullshit Deal Childhood Cancer Is

Heartland Little League, All Knotted Up

On The Underrated Sublimity Of Throwing Your Miserable Guts Up

O.C.P. Now Stands For 'Opening Crap Pitch'

The Mets Can't Hit And Can't Pitch But They Sure Can Fire People

The Grizzlies' Front Office Is A Dysfunctional Zoo Of Obtuseness

Why Nicolas Mahut Would Prefer Questions In French

North Korea Is Another Year Closer To Soccer World Domination

The West Is OKC's Until Kevin Durant Says Otherwise

Ex-Cowboys DT Josh Brent Guilty Of Intoxication Manslaughter

Here Comes The Federer-Nadal To Possibly End All Federer-Nadals