miserableshitehawk Page 83 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Rudy Gobert Says Dion Waiters Deliberately Targeted His Knees
Heat guard Dion Waiters made kind of a dumb and reckless play going for a loose ball Friday night against the Utah Jazz. His effort sent him crashing into the infinitely long legs of Jazz center Rudy Gobert, the right one of which bent inwards at a terrifying angle:...
Middle Ball Child Left Behind In China After Alleged Shoplifting
The three UCLA freshmen—Jalen Hill, Cody Riley, and LiAngelo Ball—caught stealing from a Louis Vuitton store in Hangzhou last week were not able to accompany their teammates back to the United States Saturday night, reports ESPN. Apparently this is not because they will be spending the remainder of ...
Stephon Marbury Spares Jimmer Fredette "The Real Power" In Altercation
Hey, remember Jimmer Fredette? Sure you do: “The Jimmer” was in a boy band or something in the late aughts before moving abroad to pursue an international basketball career. Tiger Beat subscribers of a certain age will be interested to know his Shanghai Sharks played against Stephon Marbury’s Beijin...
Miami Fan Charged With Felony Battery After Getting Slugged By Cop
The drunken Miami Hurricanes fan seen getting knocked out by a punch from a Miami-Dade police officer while being carried out of yesterday’s Virginia Tech-Miami game is now being charged with felony battery on a police officer, according to an Associated Press report....
Miami Dolphins Announce New Fund To Address Social Justice Issues
Saturday night Miami Dolphins players and Dolphins owner Stephen Ross announced the creation of a yearly fund with the purpose of advocating for and sponsoring social justice programs in South Florida. There are a lot of bullet-pointed details in there, and I urge you to read through the whole thing...
May Andre Drummond's Recent Free Throw Success Never End
Andre Drummond, in his career, has been a hilariously bad free throw shooter. He’s not the first: Chris Dudley was such a disastrously terrible free throw shooter during his career that his name—a name that would not otherwise echo much in the minds of basketball fans—became a reference point for lo...
The Tonga Vs. Samoa Face-Off At The Rugby League World Cup Was Incredibly Badass
Yesterday’s Tonga versus Samoa match at the 2017 Rugby League World Cup in New Zealand opened with one hell of a badass scene, as the two teams engaged in a prematch face-off for the ages. This thing rules so hard:...
Deadspin Up All Night: La Tarde Es Caramelo
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Drink, but not too much!...
Youth Hockey Coach Fired For Completely Fucking Bonkers Pregame Rant
The Littleton Hockey Association has removed a coach from its Bantam travel team after video surfaced on social media of what can only be described as one of the most incredible and unhinged pregame motivational rants in the history of youth hockey, hockey, and, indeed, sports:...
Bundesliga Keeper Confidently Kicks An Old Memory Of The Ball
Sure-footed and not at all hungover Mainz keeper Robin Zentner made a curious and nearly catastrophic blunder today after lingering on possession for a beat or two too long in a match against Mönchengladbach:...
Toilet Paper Madness Costs Field Hockey Powerhouse Spot In State Tournament
Severna Park, a Maryland high school with a history of kicking major butt at field hockey, has been disqualified from the Maryland 4A state semifinals after an annual toilet-papering ritual blew out of hand, reports the Washington Post. But, you are wondering, just what the hell is an annual toilet-...
Rambling Flat-Earth Truther Suggests Tyronn Lue Lacks "Intellectual Mind"
Kyrie Irving, a splendid basketball player with a habit of speaking like his entire vocabulary of multisyllabic words is operated by a lotto machine, went on Geno Auriemma’s podcast and told the coach that his eagerness to join the Boston Celtics came down, in part, to “intellectual human being” Bra...
Enjoy Kristaps Porzingis Chasing Josh Jackson Around Like An Angry Storm Cloud
The Knicks beat the Suns last night behind another incredible offensive performance from young Kristaps Porzingis. The Suns have looked frisky since the firing of Earl Watson—that doesn’t make this some great win, but it does help make the case that the Knicks are not, in fact, complete trash. No. W...
Turkish NBA Fans Are Being Spared Knicks Games
What’s the more notable detail from this SNY report: that Knicks games are apparently being blacked out in Turkey as part of the Turkish government’s ongoing hostility towards Enes Kanter; or that Enes Kanter expects the Knicks—currently in the NBA’s bottom 10 in both offensive and defensive rating...
LeBron James Devoured The Noisy Wizards
The context for LeBron’s 57-point masterpiece last night is something I, a devoted Wizards fan, would prefer to ignore—the Wizards spent portions of the spring and an interview with ESPN’s The Jump chirping that the Cavs ducked them in last season’s playoffs, and went so far as to say that they, the...
Bradley Beal And Draymond Green Avoid Suspensions For Their Firm Embrace
The NBA today announced that Bradley Beal has been fined $50,000 for his intense hugging of Draymond Green, while Green has been fined $25,000 for hugging back. Kelly Oubre was also fined, for actions related to socking his teammate right in the back of the damn head:...
Markelle Fultz Will Now Be Out Indefinitely
Sixers first overall draft pick Markelle Fultz has had a downright nightmarish start to his NBA career, with his free-throw form devolving into something akin to rave dancing, and his jumper—a hugely significant part of his pre-draft hype—disappearing altogether. We learned eventually that these cha...
Soccer Man's Dick Shredded By Impact With Cleat
My friends, I am about to present you with video of a man getting kicked in the dick and balls by another man in cleats, and then the excruciating pain to follow, and then the injured man waving for assistance. But it’s what happens in the final split second of this video that will surely chill you ...
Stephen A. Smith Has Manufactured Another Insane Feud With A Professional Athlete
ESPN shit-for-brains Stephen A. Smith recently shared some, umm, thoughts (?) on his radio show about the new Nike NBA warmups, which come with comfy hoods. Certain players have taken to wearing the hoods during pregame warmups, and when sitting on the bench. Smith, in full-on psychotic raving mode,...
Donovan Mitchell Is A Good Reason To Watch Utah Jazz Games
The Jazz hosted (and smoked) the Lakers last night, and you will be forgiven if this matchup didn’t strike you right away as a meeting of two of the most exciting rookie guards in the NBA. After all, the Jazz are good, and the Lakers are very much not good, and Donovan Mitchell, Utah’s prized rookie...