patrickredford Page 157 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Internet Man Flays Post-Human ESPN Shithead Darren Rovell By Tunelessly Singing His Dumb Tweets (UPDATE: There's More)
Post-human business doof Darren Rovell did some tweets tonight, like he does whenever a dollar farts. They were bad and bland in their undressed form, but Twitter user @trillballins spiced them up with dramatic vocals and now I love them. Consider this asinine joke our dude probably drafted a week a...

LeBron James Murders Rim
This evening, an innocent (maybe) basketball ring in Cleveland, Ohio was murdered by LeBron James, after he turned DeMarre Carroll into a garden statue and churned into the lane alone....

Sixers Win NBA Draft Lottery They Claim Was Not Rigged And The Ghost Of The Process Lives
Despite all assurances that the Sixers did not know that they would win this evening’s draft lottery, the ping pong balls bounced in their favor, and they’ll get the first crack at next month’s NBA draft. Was it rigged? Who knows. All we can say now is that there is some convincing evidence that Dik...

Sixers Claim That Dikembe Mutombo Didn't Reveal A Grand NBA Draft Conspiracy (UPDATE)
The NBA draft lottery is at 8 p.m. EDT tonight in New York City. At 4:36 p.m., Dikembe Mutombo tweeted his congratulations to his former team, the Philadelphia 76ers, for winning the lottery and “grabbing the #1 spot.” Mutombo apologized and clarified that he had tweeted too soon and was just gettin...

Report: Fredi González Found Out He Was Fired Via An Email About A Flight Reservation
Fredi González was officially fired by the Atlanta Braves this morning after the team lost in Pittsburgh last night to bring their record down to 9-28. The game was the first of a four-game road series, and, according to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, González first found out something was up whe...

This Little A's Fan Is An Elite Left Fielder
The Oakland A’s, who are cool and good, beat the most pugilistic team in the AL West, the Texas Rangers, thanks to a great start from Sean Manaea and another dinger from Marcus Semien. Someone had to win, so that’s not that impressive, but the catch this little fan made, which was so good his dad sp...

The Thunder Aren’t Scared Of The Warriors
As Steph Curry hit a buzzer-beater to end the first half and cap off a run by Golden State’s fabled smallball lineup of death, it felt like the Warriors were bound to keep burning the Thunder and run away with Game 1, much like the Spurs did to them to open that series. When Curry hit two improbable...

Brad Ausmus Melts Down, Curses Out Ump, Claims Home Plate With His Sweater
The Tigers were up 8-0 on the Twins after the first inning, and they’ve spent the next seven inning melting down and letting them tie it up. After Nick Castellanos struck out in the fourth inning, Tigers manager Brad Ausmus went straight at home plate umpire Doug Eddings and got tossed after very gr...

Ruddy Tigers Fan Snags Miguel Cabrera's Bat Out Of The Sky
As far as baseball fans catching objects go, Tigers fans are probably having the best season in baseball. A dude caught five foul balls in a single game last month, and while A’s fans have been good foul ball defenders all year, a jolly-looking man put the Tigers firmly in the lead this evening with...

Rougned Odor Doesn’t Regret Walloping Jose Bautista, Claims Self-Defense
The Rangers and Blue Jays had a batshit insane brawl yesterday that featured a series of fights and plenty of intense yelling, but all that noise doesn’t amount to much, since Rougned Odor slugging Jose Bautista was so clean and violent that it’s taken on a life of its own outside the specific conte...

The Cubs Are Good At Karaoke Too
The Cubs are good at baseball. Real damn good. They lost a narrow one to the Pirates yesterday but they’re still 27-9. The team has an off day today, so naturally, they went and did some karaoke last night. ChiCitySports.com was on the scene as Dexter Fowler, John Lackey, Anthony Rizzo, Jon Lester, ...

Root For The Oakland A's This Year
This is part of an occasional series of slightly belated MLB season previews....

The Lord Rejects That Weak Shit In Mysterious Ways
What we have here is a young teen (presumably) trying to dunk on a man of the cloth (presumably). He got smote....

Bob Bradley's Le Havre Miss Out On Promotion To Ligue 1 By One Goal
Aww hell. Bob Bradley, former USMNT coach, took over French second-division club Le Havre in November and got the team off and running towards promotion to Ligue 1. Heading into today, Le Havre trailed Metz by three points and six goals. To make it to a top European league for the first time, Bradle...

Here's The Best Sports Highlight Of The Day
You thought there weren’t any good sports on this afternoon? No. Wrong. This is the best sports highlight of the day....

Anti-Doping Agency Says Kenya Is In The Midst Of A Doping Crisis; No One Cares
The run-up to this summer’s Olympics in Rio have been a disaster, between the prevalence of the Zika virus, Brazil’s political upheaval, and deadly problems with Rio’s Olympic infrastructure. It doesn’t help matters that the World Anti Doping Agency (WADA) is in the midst of a meltdown, with all man...

A Good Cat Got Loose On The Field At The Angels Game
A nice cat escaped from somewhere and got onto the field at the Angels game this evening, ran around a bunch, leapt a wall, and ran through hundreds of bemused fans. The best part of this video is watching the reactions of cascading sections of fans as our friend here made his break for freedom....

Kevin Durant Is Still The Shit
Since Steph Curry ate the NBA whole and arose as the preeminent superstar in the NBA last year, the luster on Kevin Durant has faded a little bit. The Thunder have stagnated since they made the Finals in 2012, and Durant and Russell Westbrook have only made incremental progress in learning how to en...

Is This A Dick Or What?
This evening, reader Grant was looking for running shoes on Zappos when he stumbled upon what appeared to be a dong on the sole of some Nikes. He sent us a tip, and he sparked a brief debate in the Deadspin newsroom. Friends, this appears to be a dick. Let’s assess....

Move Over Hank The Dog, There's A New Baseball Dog In Town
Hank the Dog, the Brewers’ pooch who may or may not be a hoax, was the most famous dog in baseball until this week, when the Savannah Bananas found this good doggy abandoned in their stadium parking lot. Her name is Daisy and she’s extremely good and handsome....