sussman-old Page 8 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Watch That Winning Streak Fade Into Nothing
What are Joel Przybilla and Pau Gasol looking at? The Cloverfield monster? An upper deck blowie? Danny Noonan's putt? Whatever it was, it helped the Lakers end their 10-game winning streak in Portland....
About Last Night...
What you missed while ordering a refill of penis reduction pills... • NBA: Where is your Pau now? Blazers defeat Lakers 119-111. • NHL: Former Cardinals outfielder Setoguchi scores winning goal as San Jose beats Detroit 3-2. • MLB: Juan Gonzalez homers off ... Johan Santana? I know it's only spring ...
Derek Anderson Leaves Browns For Free Agency, Signs With Browns
I'm picturing the scene from Meet The Parents where a dejected Ben Stiller stands in an empty terminal and must wait his turn to board the airplane, thanks to the by-the-book airline employee who has yet to call his row. "Please step aside, sir."...
There's No Room In This Post-Modern World For A Little Boy And His Pecker
Last month, this very site raised your hopes with an Ohio minor league sports team being named the Peckerheads. Well, it brings me great pain to inform you all that such a team mascot will not happen....
Super Bowl XLII Fourth Quarter Live Blog
Ten total points in this game. Ten. Farking TEN POINTS. But it's close, and when it comes to neutral fans, a close game is all one can ask for at this stage of the game. Follow the season's final 15 minutes after the jump....
Super Bowl XLII Third Quarter Live Blog
Tom Brady had moments of happiness between moments of being crunched into the ground. The slim 7-3 lead is not safe by any means, the way this thing's going. Let's see what happens in the third quarter, shall we?...
Super Bowl XLII Second Quarter Live Blog
Well, that was fast. Let's do another quarter, just like the other one. The score is Giants 3, Patriots 0, and I'll go out on a limb that because the game isn't being played in the 1940s, the lead and score won't hold....
Super Bowl XLII First Quarter Live Blog
This game has been tied for two weeks. Christ, somebody score already. Follow the first quarter football happenings and corporate marketing snippets after the jump....
Stretch Your Legs, It's Almost Here
So what's gonna happen is in exactly two hours we'll begin the live blog celebrations. This will give me ample time to nap, eat, and ... wow, there's been a Frosted Flake in my beard all this time, and nobody told me!...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while asking the referee for his phone number ... • 6:17 p.m. — Super Bowl XLII: Pittsburgh Steelers at Dallas Cowboys. (Just seeing who really reads these.) [FOX] Alternative Super Bowl Programming • 6: p.m. — My Big Breasts And Me. "Three women openly discuss the negative impact thei...
Santonio Holmes and McLovin, Best Buds
• The seven best moments from the Maxim party. [Rotoworld] • Let's try to buy Liverpool FC! [Machochip] • Heath Shuler, defender of NFL in church. [Scott Van Pelt Style] • The Patriots have the Steelers' dynasty to thank. [Mondesi's House] • Shooting in Omaha was either a hate crime or being pissed ...
Robert Z. Nemeth Doesn't Care About Oddly Shaped Balls
Know what's great? (Besides those Jimmy Dean microwaveable breakfast sandwiches. Mmm mmm. I'm not actually sure why I brought this up, it's really a tangential point to the entire post.) Opinion columns written by old men who complain about everything. Enter the fray, Robert Z. Nemeth, about how foo...
It's Normal And Natural To Watch Old Super Bowl Highlights
Last night, while the world wept over videotapes and dynasties, ESPN2 strung together a bunch of those NFL Films specials of Super Bowl highlights. It might've been the most sports they've aired on one channel in quite some time....
Which Patriots Video Is Scarier?
With little on TV, it's time to partake in some of the Internet's finest available video pertaining to those with hard stances on the New England Patriots. Ahead of you are two videos of the Tube Belonging To You variety — one taking the "for" and one taking the extreme "against." It's a toss up as ...
FedEx Wants All Hungover Employees At Work Tomorrow
Until those diligent slackers get the day after Super Bowl turned into a national holiday, we the working class must continue to roll into to work on Monday, somehow, some way. Don't bother calling in sick — it doesn't work....
How To Stay "Busy" Until 6:17 p.m.
If you open your window and spit, you'll likely hit a channel with some kind of Super Bowl pregame show. But if you have Final Fantasy Legend III for the original GameBoy lying around, for the love of God don't spit on it, because that's my recommended retro game for the day....
All Other Sports, Rolled Into One
This is a big day, so in an effort to give due time to all the other sports, Deadspin is consolidating its regularly-scheduled coverage into the Everything Closer! "No love for..." your favorite sport? That's because your favorite sport might suck....