tcraggs22 Page 75 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phil Mushnick Does Not Want To Hear About Anyone's Testicles
"[Bill Raftery's] continued hollering of a crude crotch term after a big shot long ago should have ended, if not voluntarily, then on orders." Relatedly, in the same column, Mushnick professes to miss Billy Packer, who's a dick. [NYP]...

Soak Yourself In Deadspin's Spring Break Week (NSFW)
All week long Deadspin will be celebrating the phenomenon of American Spring Break. There's much to come, but for now, please watch this educational video put together by hairypalmed intern David Matthews, documenting the effects of water on cotton apparel....

Book Excerpt: "Confessions Of A Washed-Up Sportswriter," From <em>Rules Of The Game</em>
Today's excerpt comes from a 1968 essay by Gary Cartwright, anthologized in Harper's Magazine's new sportswriting anthology, Rules of the Game, which we highly recommend....

Stories That Don't Suck: Self Esteem, Ballad Of Big Star, Fantasy Baseball, Michael Lewis's First First Thing
Every week, I'll excerpt a handful of stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that I urge you to read for one reason or another. Send any suggestions to [email protected]....

The Best Thing You'll Read About Tiger's Sexting
What could Joslyn James have written to elicit Tiger's, "Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own"? Perhaps: "My screenplay really isn't coming together. Need some dialogue for the enraged donkey-owning farmer." [Slate]...

I Was There: A Classic In The Chocolate-Dipped Garden
Alan Siegel, whom you've met around these parts before, attended last year's Elite Eight matchup between Pittsburgh and Villanova. His story:...

Here's Your Pretty Tiger Woods Sexting Word Cloud
We dropped Tiger's texts into Wordle and this is what we got....

A Side-By-Side Examination Of Tiger's Golf Performance And His Concurrent Sexting
As you know, many of the texts in the Tiger Woods-Joslyn James correspondence were sent during Tiger's golf tournaments. At the Barclays, for instance, Woods finished a disappointing second but also expressed a fond wish to make Joslyn James sore....

Last Night's Winner: Cirrhosis Of The Liver
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like all you rummies out there who have merged St. Patrick's Day and March Madness into a sort of extended holiday—Hanukkah for drunks....

Seton Hall Fires Bobby Gonzalez, Leader Of Cock-Punchers And Alleged Burglars
Bobby Gonzalez was doomed the moment reporters got his former secretary to bag on him, but if there's a proper day to get canned, it's probably the day after your erstwhile charges engage in some nutpunching and (alleged) burgling....

Ron Washington Tested Positive For Cocaine Last Year, Which, Let's Be Honest, Is Pretty Awesome
SI.com narc Jon Heyman reports that Ron Washington, the Rangers' 57-year-old manager and all-around swell guy, indulged in a popular but illicit recreational drug last year. "I did make a mistake," he tells SI.com, speaking very, very quickly. [SI.com]...

Let's Listen In As The Crazy People Talk About Obama's NCAA Bracket
"'From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.' If that is your mantra, why would you watch college basketball. ... Obama should only watch sports where they do not keep score. Socialists are hipocrits." [Free Republic]...

Crotch Punch Fulfills Every Crotch Punch's Destiny, Gets Immortalized On Videotape, Part II
And now here's the video of Jackson State's Phillip Williams nutpunching Mississippi State's Dee Bost. By the time the NIT's over, we'll have a whole new section of sopranos for the pope's choir. ...

Crotch Punch Fulfills Every Crotch Punch's Destiny, Gets Immortalized On Videotape
Here's the video of Seton Hall's Herb Pope doing to Texas Tech's Darko Cohadarevic what a thousand youth baseball bats have done to two thousand youth-coach testicles. [YouTube, via TBL]...

Beckham's Torn Achilles Moves British Poet Laureate To Write Dreadful Verse
"[T]his poem is written," Carol Ann Duffy announces, "to draw a parallel with Achilles, who gave his name to Beckham's injury." Uh-oh....

The 10 Most Magnificent Footballers/Pop Stars EVER!
It's sometimes easy to forget that footballers are also human beings. Frighteningly gifted human beings, who can turn their hand to pretty much anything. Some ooze seamlessly into management or punditry, others open shops or decide to do office jobs....

Last Night's Winner: Michael David Barrett
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Michael David Barrett, Erin Andrews's peeper, who was sentenced yesterday to two-and-a-half years in prison and life as another triple-named American villain....

Why Does The Selection Committee Keep Screwing The Mid-Majors?
Joe Sheehan over at Basketball Prospectus is back aboard a favorite old hobbyhorse of his — the NCAA selection committee's habit of matching up non-BCS schools in the first round — and damned if he doesn't have a point....

The Saddest, Most Pitiful Sentence Illinois Basketball Fans Will Ever Read
"Though Illinois is seeded No. 1 in the NIT, it couldn't host a first-round game because Cirque du Soleil is performing at the Assembly Hall this week." Even sadder? My parents have tickets. [IlliniHQ]...

David Beckham Tears Achilles, Will Miss Opportunity To Vomit On The Field In Another World Cup
Beckham snapped his left achilles and will not get a chance to sit on England's bench in South Africa. Stiff upper lip, though: "The romantic notion of him seizing the day and inspiring England to glory was poppycock." [Guardian]...