williamfleitch Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Monster Wore A Tank Top. <em>Paranormal Activity 4,</em> Reviewed.
1. Like Grierson, I'm a sucker for the Paranormal Activity films. I don't care that their stories don't make sense, that apparently there's some sort of mythology tying everything together behind them, that no one ever, ever turns that goddamned camera off. These movies work not as movies—they're ba...
A Semi-Comprehensive List Of Everything Tyler Perry Pretends To Do In <em>Alex Cross</em>
Tyler Perry, tired (temporarily) of wearing dresses in his own movies, stars tomorrow in Alex Cross, playing the titular character of James Patterson's series of novels. Here is a semi-comprehensive list of everything Tyler Perry pretends to do in Alex Cross, in order. Spoilers abound....
Sam Rockwell Is The Next Christopher Walken
There's a scene, late in Seven Psychopaths, the deliriously entertaining meta-movie that opens Friday, when Sam Rockwell's character Billy—the most psychopathic of all the psychopaths of the title—attempts to decipher the hoary adage, "an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind." He mulls for a ...
Ben Affleck's Only Weakness As A Director: Casting Ben Affleck. <em>Argo</em>, Reviewed.
1. Argo is such a terrific, jaw-dropping true-life tale, with such a natural, seamless movie storyline, that anyone who knows the story would beg the filmmakers not to screw it up. So it's a relief that they absolutely do not do that. There are so many tones to juggle here; this is a film that veers...
Watch Your Favorite Actors Humiliate Themselves In <em>The Paperboy</em>, The Worst Movie Of The Year
In 2003, Matthew McConaughey starred in a film called Tiptoes that went straight to video. It might seem odd that this film would go straight to video, considering its cast included McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Gary Oldman, Patricia Arquette, and Peter Dinklage. But then you see what the film was a...
Seth MacFarlane Hosting the Oscars? Really? A Grierson & Leitch Discussion
Yesterday, the Motion Picture Academy of America announced that Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane would be hosting this year's Oscars. This was flabbergasting news, to say the least, and it took us a day to process it. We decided to talk it out, so that when we were done, it might actually make som...
Box-Office Grosses Aren't Sports Scores. Who Cares If <em>Looper</em> Flops This Weekend?
Last year, around this time, I started seeing a ton of ads on Fox NFL games for the movie Drive. I'd seen the movie early and thought it was terrific, but I couldn't help but notice how ill-fitting the promotions for the movie were juxtaposed against Pitbull's Dr. Pepper ads and Terry Bradshaw doing...
Bruce Willis And Time Travel, Both More Alive Than Ever. <em>Looper,</em> Reviewed.
1. Looper is essentially two different movies spliced together at the midway point, but that's OK, because: a) the movies are thematically connected, with the second building off the windup of the first; and b) they're both excellent. The first half is a dark, thrilling time-travel mind-twister that...
<em>End Of Watch</em>: How Cops See Themselves
For some reason, I'm reminded of an old Letterman Top 10 list, from Dec. 1, 1989. (How great is it, by the way, that there's an online database of old Letterman Top 10 lists?) The list was "Top 10 Amish Pickup Lines." This one always just killed me: "Say, my favorite movie is Witness too!" (All righ...
Paint Your Corners. Clint Eastwood's Baseball Movie, <em>Trouble With The Curve</em>, Reviewed.
1. Pretty much everything about Trouble With the Curve is a crock, but I couldn't help but like it anyway. It has a hackneyed, painfully overstructured screenplay; its motivations for its characters are stock at best and embarrassingly obvious at worst; and it knows so little about the game of baseb...
Know A Black Guy, And Other Tips For Being A One Percenter From Richard Gere's Stupid New Movie, <em>Arbitrage</em>
I try to avoid pre-release publicity, even trailers, as much as possible, but inevitably one gets blasted with the Internet news firehose no matter how much one tries to avoid it. So I knew that Arbitrage, which opens Friday, was supposed to be a thriller about a hyper-wealthy hedge fund manager and...
Desperate Characters And A Director In Utter Control: <em>The Master</em>, Reviewed.
1. The Master is a movie that leaves you vibrating for about 20 minutes after it's over, though you might be at a bit of pains to explain why. I've only seen the film once, which is a shame; it's the sort of film you want to hit rewind and go through again, immediately, right as the credits get goin...
Like A Meaner, Braver, Less Funny <em>Bridesmaids</em>. <em>Bachelorette</em>, Reviewed.
1. In retrospect, the "surprising" success of Bridesmaids should have been the furthest thing from a surprise. It was a big, broad, audience-friendly comedy that made sure, in between all the poop jokes and the rampant silliness, that you liked all of its characters. It was ribald and bawdy, but nev...
A Movie About Books Made By People Who Don't Read Them. <em>The Words</em>, Reviewed.
1. When my first book was published—and "published" is honestly being kind; it's probably more accurate to say it was "repeatedly photocopied"—perhaps the most common question family members asked me: So, are you going to go on Oprah? They were joking (I think), but something about their question wa...
<em>2016: Obama's America</em>: Whose America Is This Movie For?
Last weekend, 2016: Obama's America, an anti-Obama documentary released in roughly 1,000 theaters nationwide, shocked observers by making more money than fellow new releases Premium Rush and Hit & Run, both of which were shown on twice as many screens. It's already the sixth-highest-grossing politic...
The Good, The Bad And The Smugly. <em>Lawless</em>, Reviewed.
1. It is strange to consider the fact that Shia LaBeouf considers Lawless an art film. Only a guy who has spent his adult life standing in front of a green screen while Michael Bay screams "I dunno, just, like, run like crazy, and shit" could consider Lawless some sort of higher, refined form of exp...
First, Kill All The Cyclists. <em>Premium Rush</em>, Reviewed.
1. It's difficult to overstate how much I dislike bicycle riders in New York City. (Collectively. I'm sure you, individual who rides his/her bike, are perfectly pleasant and normal ... when you're not on your bike.) Bike riders have taken over this city, and they are, almost entirely across the boar...
The Genius Of <em>Enemy Of The State</em>, Tony Scott's Best Film
In the reaction to the sudden death of Tony Scott, a quick consensus emerged: Scott was a more interesting director than he'd been given credit for throughout his career; Top Gun and his general style helped usher in the age of Michael Bay and Olivier Megaton-ism; and the one movie everyone could ag...
Your <em>Expendables 2</em> Power Rankings
The Expendables 2 has 11 names on its poster only because there is not room, either in poster space or running time, for 47. It is New Years Eve with testicles. It is the turducken of action movies. Rather than review the film, I thought I'd just rank those 11 names, in ascending order of Expendable...
<em>Compliance</em>: A Grierson & Leitch Conversation About Pranks, Coercion, And Blowjobs
Compliance, which opens Friday, was one of the most debated movies at the 2012 Sundance Film Festival. Starring Dreama Walker (now better known for Don't Trust the B—— in Apartment 23) and written and directed by Craig Zobel, it's a psychological thriller about an Ohio fast-food joint that becomes t...