Bartender Unwittingly Serves "Flaming Lithuanian"
Keep an eye on the balding fellow, leftmost among the guys in white shirts at the start of the video. Look at that poor bastard. Dude's tired and depressed from a long day of middle-managing a Lithuanian bioinformatics firm or whatever, just minding his own business, trying to have a drink and a good time, trying to forget his troubles for a while. I bet his name is Donatas. He looks like a Donatas. Poor ol' Donatas. Rough day for the Donster.
He just wants something to get the ol' blood pumping again. To make him feel alive! What was that drink the hip young guys were talking about at the office last week? The Flaming ... Porsche? Ferrari? No ... Lamborghini! That's the one. Yeah, one of those. Donatas will have the Flaming Lamborghini. One Flaming Lamborghini, one jolt of hot fiery excitement, and then he can go home to Viktorija and the kids with a smile and some pep in his step.
Yeah, keep your eye on your good buddy Donatas. What happens next is, the bartender turns his head into a fucking tiki torch.
The most intriguing thing about this video is the uptempo nightclubby music playing over it. What is this music supposed to make us feel? It's sexy dancing music. Is it supposed to make us excited? Are we supposed to be grooving along to Donatas's immolation?
For me, I like to imagine that this video is actually a Lithuanian advertisement for the bar, Naktinis Tbilisis, where this happened. That, for Lithuanians, having your head incinerated by a cute bartender is, like, the thing to do on a Friday night. Frankly, that makes me feel better about what's happening to my good buddy Donatas. That he'll go back into work a few days later, and people will ask him where his eyebrows went, and he'll be all, "Donatas have eyebrows burned off by bartender!" and they'll all high-five in slow motion, and then he'll give a freeze-frame thumbs-up to the camera as the credits roll.
In reality, Donatas is in the hospital, and likely will need plastic surgery to repair the burns to his face and ears, which the bar's owner * has agreed to pay for. Don't order flaming beverages, Lithuanians.
[ Eater]


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