Baseball Page 1279 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Really Old Guy Doesn't Like Drama Queen Cheaters, So He Doesn't Like Derek Jeter
When Derek Jeter stole first pretending he'd been hit by a pitch, 87-year-old baseball-card-store "volunteer" Al Merrill didn't just get mad. He cost himself about a hundred bucks....

Analyst: Cardinals Quit With "Poopy in their Pants" and "Skid Marks in Their Britches"
Former St. Louis Cardinals outfielder, and current team anaylst, Jack "The Ripper" Clark has grown tired with the home nine's lack of effort. He isn't content just to mention that they're "quitters," though. He gets all diagnosis-y with it....

Troy Tulowitzki's Monster Month Undermined With A Dirty Song
Tulo hit his 10th and 11th home runs of the month yesterday and is leading the way for the surging Rockies. However, overshadowing Carlos Gonzalez's spectacular season is a real dick move. [Music via David Bartholomew]...

Baseball Player Acts Like Soccer Player, Inspires Existential Crises
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Pete Rose: “Don’t Do Like Me”
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Pete Rose....

Atlanta Braves Fans Are Filthier Than The Guys Using The John In Penn Station, Science Proves
"Only about two-thirds of the men observed washed their hands after using the restroom at Turner Field — the lowest rate for any of the locations cited in the observational study and survey on the hand-washing habits of Americans."...

Waino, Skip, And The Double Dutch Rudder
Sometimes, we post thoughtful and measured criticism of athletes and the media. Other times we post videos that make it look like two Cardinals players are beating each other off....

Rafael Nadal Digs Deep For A U.S. Open Victory
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Josh Hamilton Is Wary Of Victory Champagne
What happens if when the Rangers clinch the AL West? "I'm going to have goggles on, duct tape over the mouth and either a wetsuit or raincoat...I don't want to send the wrong message to people who might see pictures." [DMN]...

Pat White Has Taken His "Talents" To K.C.
The Dolphins released [former second-round pick Pat] White on September 4, and White passed through waivers unclaimed....

Boston Columnist Doth Question White Jesus' Free Ride, Pre-Kickoff Smiting Expected
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Fake Press Release Makes Worthless Cubs/Brewers Game Temporarily Interesting
How do you make a Cubs/Brewers interesting when they have a combined 126-155 record? You slip a fake press release supposedly written by Cubs GM Jim Hendry into the press pack! Here's a pic (via Paul Sullivan's Twitter) ......

Is It Foul If The Ball Hits John Smoltz's Pole?
During last night's Braves-Cardinals game, the crew in the booth flashed back to Sunday's TBS game to show a replay of John Smoltz getting plunked in the junk by an Adrian Beltre foul ball. Your move, Aaron Cook....

Cincinnati Reds To Commemorate 9/11 With Action-Packed Navy SEAL Demonstration
Tomorrow's Reds game will be a gala affair. They're celebrating Pete Rose breaking the hits record, honoring local firemen, and since it's 9/11, some Navy SEALs will be on hand to conduct an "extraction simulation" before delivering the game ball. [Cincinnati Enquirer]...

Watch And Hear Aaron Cook Fracture His Fibula
Joey Votto broke Colorado Rockies pitcher Aaron Cook's fibula last night on a hard liner and it's really something to hear. Again and again. And again and again and again. [HardballTalk, video via MLB.com]...

Red Sox Nation Is Made Up Of Lots Of White Women
Our friends at Gizmodo did some fancy-scientific breakdown of the language used overwhelmingly by specific races, and they found that the biggest outlier among white women is "The Red Sox." Black men, on the other hand, love "ESPN."...

Derek Jeter: The <em>True</em> True Yankee. Seriously.
The first time I heard of Derek Jeter, this young star emerging from the Yankees' farm system, I was an 8-year-old boy. He has never not been my favorite baseball player — even now, when he's neither young nor a star....

And Now Time For Some Fun With A Bryce Harper Q&A
A reader brought this Bryce Harper Q&A to our attention. In it Harper expresses his disdain for high school. While that's bad—albeit expected—there's some other terrible stuff in the interview. Let's look at the highlights....

Dodgers Fan Takes a Dinger to the Dome
What happens when you don't listen to the guy screaming, "Heads up! Heads up!" in the line of batting practice fire? This......
