Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

The latest reminder that the brains of sports fans function quite differently than those that belong to more well-adjusted individuals comes from Cleveland. Robert Stewart, a young Browns fan, got so excited his team traded for Odell Beckham Jr. that he started running up and down his neighborhood while screaming and throwing his arms around. He took video of himself during his moment yelling “WE GOT ODELL! WE GOT ODELL! WE GOT... WE GOT... WE GOT ODELL!”

Anyone who understands the plight of Browns fans over the past, uhh, eternity would be willing to accept this reaction to the news. Unfortunately, his neighbor, Corita Jackson, was not one of those people. She instead saw someone she didn’t immediately recognize running up and down a street screaming, kept her kids in the car and called the police.


Let’s get this out of the way now: there’s a dark alternate timeline where this ends in terrible fashion. Thankfully, this isn’t one of those times.

Narrator: However, Stewart’s celebration was cut short, when officers arrived. But when he told them why...

Stewart: “Oh, we got OBJ!” and then we dapped it up. Everything was all cool and they went back on about their day.

I’m not sure what’s better: Jackson being so out of the loop of the sports world that she asked if Stewart was celebrating a recent Browns win, or the fact that the local news had Stewart recreate his celebration.


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