The Bills, as you’ve no doubt heard by now, have finally broken the NFL’s longest active playoff drought. Wonderful! Such joy for so many long-suffering fans! And a columnist for the local paper has one message for them: please shut up about your “sports,” haven’t you heard that there are literally dozens of other things in the world???
Rod Watson’s column is headlined “Playoff game? Please don’t tell me any more about it.” Here’s the first line:
Does the phrase “Get a life!” mean anything around here?
...and you can probably imagine how it proceeds from there. Potential nuclear war and the terrible tax bill and the struggles of the local school system are mentioned as some of the many other things that Bills fans could choose to care about if they weren’t wasting all this energy on the Bills. Here’s one particularly choice excerpt:
Buffalo needs help. At the inevitable watch parties, we should use halftime for mass therapy sessions to reaffirm what should be obvious: There are things more important than Tyrod Taylor’s quarterback rating. A city with Frank Lloyd Wright and Louis Sullivan masterpieces, Underground Railroad sites and a burgeoning medical campus should not have to fixate on LeSean McCoy’s all-purpose yardage.
May Rod Watson one day be able to learn the magic of caring about two—maybe three?—things at once. Maybe he can even pull it off while looking at a Frank Lloyd Wright building.