Carbonated Soft Drinks, Ranked

1. Cream soda

2. Root Beer

3. Cola (cherry)

4. Orange soda

5. Grape soda

6. Cola (not cherry)

7. Ginger Ale

8. "Pepper"-flavored (?) soda

9. Lemon-Lime soda

10. Being hit by a car

11. Mountain Dew

Please note: Some may argue for Moxie's inclusion on this list, but this argument is based on the common misconception that Moxie is a carbonated soft drink, and not fermented tobacco juice.