Cut. That. Meat.

Well, the time has finally come. It's almost time for the Colts and Patriots to kick off, and thus, for Peyton Manning to engage in a no-win situation. If he loses, he's still firmly entrenched in the role of Tom Brady's lawnboy. If he wins, it's a meaningless regular season game that won't even be an afterthought if there's a rematch in January. Peyton Manning can keep the Colts undefeated tonight, but he can't make himself as masculine as Tom Brady, no matter what that picture may lead you to believe.

And there are other storylines, if you're tired of that one. There's Adam Vinatieri's first game against the team on which he made himself a legend, there's Bill Belichick's ongoing to quest to go three or four hours without banging someone else's wife... and if that's not enough, there's always Peter King at halftime, and I know how much you love that.

So settle in and follow the game here with your fellow commenters, if you'd like. There can't be a better place in the world for you to be, if you're up for making fun of Peyton Manning for 200 straight minutes or so.