Definitively Proving Existence Of Higher Power, Nike Sues CrossFit

Litigation-loving CrossFit has made a name for itself by suing the balls off anyone that messes with its "brand." Now one CF gym in West Palm Beach is finding out how the other shoe fits after Nike, Inc. has filed an action against the gym for blatantly ripping of its Jordan logo.

To be fair, CrossFit CityPlace did modify the logo—they turned it upside down, and claim that the man is not Jordan; he is in fact gym owner Matt Brewster balancing upside down on a kettle bell circa 2011.

The Jordan or "Jumpman" logo came from an SI photoshoot in 1984, and was adopted in 1985.

In the best bit of bullshit this Friday, Brewster is "astonished" at Nike's suit, according the Palm Beach Post, and claims—believes?—the images are not at all similar.

"They're trying to bully the little guy because they've got more money," Brewster said. "They're trying to scare us, but we're not going to be scared." He has vowed to fight the suit.

Brewster's lawyer, who of course also practices CrossFit, says that this suit stems from the fact that Nike "missed the boat" on the fitness program, which has branded itself with Reebok, and that it is in fact Nike that turned the gym's logo right-side up. As proof, he is on record saying, "I've never seen Michael Jordan slam dunk a 70-pound kettle bell upside down."

Nike has made no comment, likely due to the CrossFit lawyer's irrefutable logic.

[ Palm Beach Post]