Yeah, well don't get too smug, Tigers' fans. Considering that you started the season 0-7, and you couldn't beat a wildly off-target Daisuke Matsuzaka on Monday, losing 6-3 — your fourth straight loss — I wouldn't be mocking the Lions too loudly. It may not be long before your fans are wearing paper bags on their heads. But I kid Tigers' fans. Um, Fire Millen?
Daisuke-K (5-0) surrendered eight of Boston's 10 walks, but Mike Lowell (!), Kevin Youkilis and David Ortiz all hit homers for the Stockings, who won their fourth straight. From AP: "Matsuzaka had coldlike symptoms throughout the day and didn't feel good." Awww ... get out there and pitch, mama's boy. But I kid Dice-K, who lasted five innings, with Dancin' Jonathan Papelbon pitching the ninth for his 10th save in 10 chances. By the way, thanks for the photo, Sox and Dawgs. Also, Sheffield batting sixth? And playing left? Is this permanent, Mr. Leyland?
• Rock On. Which Santana is better? The Angels' Ervin (6-0) or the Mets' Johan ($137.5 million through 2013)? Discuss. Quiz: Which one was born in Venezuela, and which was born in the Dominican?
• While On The Subject Of The Mets ... Matt Kemp — he's the NL Player of the Week, you know — had a home run to lead off the game as the Dodgers beat Oliver Perez and the Mets, 5-1. That's nine wins in 10 games for Torre's squad.
• In Case Of Fire, Use Stairs. Well, that didn't improve Ozzie Guillen's mood any. Matt Stairs' home run was the only meaningful offense in Toronto's 1-0 win over the White Sox, which featured a great pitching duel between Dustin McGowan and Javier Vazquez. Toronto closer B.J. Ryan walked the bases loaded in the ninth, but Pablo Ozuna grounded into a 1-2-3 double play to end the game.
• Go To Bed Old Man! One day after being mocked by this writer as being old enough to have fought the Nazis alongside Indiana Jones, Jamie Moyer threw my words back into my face, outpitching Arizona's Max Scherzer in an 11-4 Phillies victory. Moyer, making the 558th start of his career, went seven innings. Although with 11 runs, I could have lasted five. Moyer also doubled.
• Eric The Half-A-Bee. Larry Brown Sports makes the case against the Brewers sticking with Eric Gagne as their closer. Making the case for Gagne will be the actual Larry Brown.