Eleven Very Important Takes About The Golden State Warriors

1. They are not the best team ever.

2. Everyone hates them now.

3. Michael Jordan never would have lost three games to this Cleveland team.

4. They have no class and cannot win without cockpunching.

5. They are soft and cannot respond when someone metaphorically cockpunches them back.

6. Andrew Bogut was their real MVP, and they are now lost without him.

7. Klay is better than Steph.

8. Steph’s best shot in this series was when he barely missed that guy’s mouth with his mouthguard.

9. Kevin Draper hid from our group chat after last night’s loss, proving that all Warriors fans are pathetic cowards.

10. WTF, Ayesha?

11. This is not the right question, Mike Florio …

The right question is … why can’t the Warriors close out LeBron in the clutch (except for when they did it last year)? And I’ll tell you why: Because they are SOFT and WEAK.