Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Fart-Gate Scandal Blown Wide Open

Illustration for article titled Fart-Gate Scandal Blown Wide Open

After what seems like decades of secrecy and lies, America demands to know: Who cut the cheese? Now we may finally have our answer. The conspiracy goes far deeper than any of us could have imagined....and it really stinks.


An unnamed source—obviously fearful for his life and liberty—has confirmed that the flatulence giver was indeed CBS golf analyst David Feherty, at least according to golf blog Wei Under Par. Whether the sound came by natural or unnatural means, remains unclear. But it's so much more insidious than just a simple passing of the gas. The source also claims that Feherty and Tiger Woods have an ongoing "fart feud" and enjoy cracking each other up with the sounds of bodily functions. That would explain why someone was able to rip one off in the golf god's presence without caddy Steve Williams corking the offender with a five iron.

So there you have it—Tiger Woods thinks farts are funny. He is not just a machine. He's a machine with a heart.

Source Confirms David Feherty Was Buick Open Farter [Wei Under Par]