Football Page 1212 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Seahawks Fans Will Attempt To Set The World Record For Crowd Noise
On Sunday night, presumably during the 49ers' first offensive series, the fans at CenturyLink Field will attempt to set a Guinness World Record for the loudest crowd roar. It will not be an easy task....

More Illustrated NFL Playbook Fun
When we did the Bills edition of Why Your Team Sucks, reader Matt E. sent in a phony drawing of the team's playbook that was so awesome, we asked him to do a few more of them. Here now are the playbooks of five more NFL teams, as designed by Matt:...

Reports: Buccaneers Already A Dysfunctional Shitshow
The NFL season hasn't truly started until one team melts down, revealing locker room divisions via anonymous leaks. And who better than the underachieving Buccaneers, with a hardass college coach and a disappointing young QB with a notoriously bad relationship? ...

Report: Mark Sanchez Likely To Have Season-Ending Surgery
Well, that'll do Mark. That'll do. Mere days after SportsCenter put to rest what will undoubtedly be in the first line of his obituary, Mark Sanchez's season is done. According to Chris Mortensen, Dr. James Andrews has determined that Sanchez has a "labral tear in his right shoulder." Sanchez still ...

Former Chiefs Coach Todd Haley Autographs Bar Napkin: "Chiefs Suck!!"
A reader named Joe sent this our way. It's an autograph he got on a bar napkin from Steelers offensive coordinator Todd Haley. Joe explained what happened in an email. This is that story, unedited. Be warned: There are no heroes here. There's a guy being a dick to Haley, and Haley being a dick right...

Sadsack Former NFL Player Punked—Twice—By Drunken Comedians
As with all great ideas, the initial plan was hatched by a couple of drunk guys at a bar who had nothing better to do....

Texans Fan Drinks Own Piss In Irrational Display Of Loyalty
There are many baffling things about this video of a Texans fan drinking his own urine in the wake of his team's comeback performance against the Chargers late Monday night. Why does he combine jars of warm urine and cold urine? Also, why the hell is he drinking his own piss? Here he is, in his own...

Alabama Bar Features Johnny Manziel Piñata For Patrons To Smash
With Alabama-Texas A&M this Saturday, fans of both teams are gearing up for what should be one of the most entertaining games of the college football season. One Alabama bar is getting ready by bringing in "Lil' Johnny Piñata." ...

We Have Seen The Worst Pass Ever Thrown: 125 FBS Teams, Ranked
Each week during college football season we put the conventional polls to shame by ranking every FBS team from 1-125, by whatever standard we see fit. Last week's rankings were not consulted....

Chargers Greet Fans At Stadium With Big Ol' Typo
Via For the Win, this was a sign outside Qualcomm Stadium last night. Coughing up a three-touchdown lead in the second half wasn't the only weclome the Chargers would extend to their fans....

Ndamukong Suh Gets Largest Fine For On-Field Incident In NFL History
Suh is out $100,000 for this low block on Vikings center John Sullivan. It's a record-setter, with a few caveats....

<em>Sunday Night Football</em> Producer: No Need To "Glorify" Big Hits Anymore
The producer of the NFL's flagship broadcast, NBC's Sunday Night Football, said he's getting super-cautious about showing repeated replays of rough hits, especially those of the helmet-to-helmet variety....

Chip Kelly Says The Eagles' Offense Was "Too Slow"
Kelly's got to be joking, right? The Eagles' rapid-fire first-half offense was so intense, my super is coming by tonight to clean the stains off my ceiling. ...

The NFL Keeps Sowing Confusion Over What Constitutes An Illegal Hit
The headline on PFT was posted in the wee hours Monday morning. It reads "League quietly shifts focus of helmet-to-helmet hits." Here's Florio:...

Rob Ryan Saunters Into New Orleans Dive Bar, Buys Everyone A Round
Here's reason number 3,489 why the Ryan brothers are the best....

Ndamukong Suh Likely Won't Be Suspended For Dirty Block
You can see Suh at the end of this gif, making a low block from a 90-degree angle on Vikings center John Sullivan during an interception return Sunday. He swears he wasn't aiming for the knees. The NFL apparently agrees....

Make Your Own In-Stadium Prison Shank, America!
Did you attend the Redskins game last night? Were you sitting in the upper deck of the open-air jail that is FedEx Field? Were you stabbed with a beer bottle fashioned into a shiv? No? Well, consider yourself lucky. From reader Jon......
![Your<i> Monday Night Football</i> GIF Thread [UPDATING]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18zo1pc5sbwb3gif.gif)
Your<i> Monday Night Football</i> GIF Thread [UPDATING]
Redskins fans are excited for the new season....

ASU Player Trips During Entrance, Repeatedly Gets Run Over
Just last week we were taken by the "Tillman Tunnel," the newest addition to Sun Devil Stadium. But we didn't realize that things didn't go so well once they got onto the field....