Football Page 1538 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
All Right, I'll Attend Your Stinking Workouts
After saying that he wouldn't attend the Bills' voluntary offseason conditioning program because it was, well, voluntary, Terrell Owens changes his mind and shows up on Wednesday. [The Buffalo News]...
Lions Take Stafford At No. 1. Rams, You Are Now On The Clock
At least that's what Pro Football Talk is reporting, with the caveat that interest in the Georgia QB may just be a clever smokescreen (ha ha, but anyway ...). [Pro Football Talk]...
Tank Johnson Is Obviously Confident That He's A Changed Man
The former Bear/Cowboy/convict has just signed a one year deal with...the Cincinnati Bengals. [ESPN]...
I See No Negative Safety Implications Here
If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that the new Indoor Football League is completely safe for both players and fans. But then I'm still holding on to Enron stock....
Martellus Bennett's Blog Is A Thing Of Beauty
Martellus Bennett (no relation) is best known for his fine performance on HBO's Hard Knocks and his ability to rhyme "Romo" with "homo." Now he's a blogger....and he is awesome at it....
The Prodigal Son Returns, Kind Of
Former Gilroy High, San Jose State and San Francisco 49ers QB Jeff Garcia, 39, is now an Oakland Raider, and may challenge DeMarcus Russell for the starting role. Good one, Al. [San Francisco Chronicle]...
Jack Elway Will Never Be Like You, Dad!
He had the genes, the Aryan good looks, and the resources to become a top-flight college quarterback. If only someone had checked to see if John Elway's son ever cared about football in the first place....
Maybe B.J. Raji Isn't A Dopehead
Oh, anonymous sources ... you've done it again. Those crazy "web logs" have reported that at least six football players failed pre-draft drug tests, which the players naturally deny. So whose pants are on fire?...
Leave Tony Romo Alone! (Sob) He's A Human Being!
Eminem is back after a two-year hiatus (I know you've been waiting), and his new single, We Made You, should horrify Cowboys fans. Will the indignities never end for Tony Romo?...
Who's The Highest Paid Tight End In NFL History?
That's right. That guy. That Vin Diesel-looking dude. The one with the injury problems and the staph infection. That guy. [SI]...
Plaxico Burress Just Not Caring About Anything Anymore
Plaxico Burress has obviously just given up on obeying any authority figure ever. Just days after the Giants finally dumped him, comes words of another run-in with police that did not end happily for anyone....
The Iowa Hawkeyes Are Already In Midseason Form
One should never go into spring break cold. It's important to ease into it with a few warmup public intoxication arrests, as these three Iowa football players can tell you....
Tom And Gisele's Shotgun Wedding
"Two freelance photographers who snapped pics of Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen's weekend wedding in Costa Rica say they were shot at by the supermodel's security personnel." And they didn't even get cake! [Boston Globe]...
Eric Mangini Will Destroy USC Football From The Inside
Here's a nightmare scenario for Trojan fans everywhere—head coach Pete Carroll announced that he has been "talking ball" with the Browns new chief Eric Mangini....
Brian Dawkins To Make His Biggest Fan Whole
Brian Dawkins indirectly cost Eagles superfan Dan Leone his job and Dawkins is going to make up for that in big way. A pair of tickets should cover it, right?...
Maybe They Shouldn't Have Torn Down The RCA Dome Just Yet
Now, I would never accuse a government official of being full of shit, but I'm having a hard time believing that Indianapolis will actually follow through with threats to close Lucas Oil Stadium....
Michael Vick Is Still An Idiot
Yesterday, a Virginia bankruptcy court rejected Michael Vick's, um, completely idiotic bankruptcy plan. Why? Perhaps it was a bad idea for a broke, unemployed athlete to claim he needs two houses and four cars....
Chicago, Meet Your New Quarterback: Jay Cutler
In somewhat of a stunning move in the, wow-that-happened-fast sense, the Denver Broncos have traded Jay Cutler to the Chicago Bears for, well — A LOT....
Kim Kardashian And Photoshop Not Getting Along Lately
So here's an interesting photo from the Reggie Bush-Kim Kardashian spread in the April issue of GQ. Anyone see anything wrong here? Or more specifically, anything missing?...
I Think We Can All Agree That The FAKE Seahawks' New Jerseys Are Hideous (With Update)
The new neon green Seahawks alternate jersey, shown here assaulting our senses so completely, turns out to be a joke, perpetrated by those rascals at Uniwatch Blog....