Football Page 1540 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Best JetBlue Flight Of All Time
We've watched our favorite teams play in some strange places. We once saw our Buzzsaw lose on the back of a boat off Lake Shelbyville while an old girlfriend vomited off the back. (We helped her out, once the outcome had been clearly decided.) But Illinois' breathtaking upset of Ohio State on Satur...

It's Vinatieri's Turn To Be The Lonesome Kicker
Tidbits and info smidgens from Week 10 in the NFL ......

Past, Present And Future Football Action
Brett Favre joined Dan Marino as the only quarterbacks in NFL history to throw for 60,000 yards during the Packers' 34-0 shellacking of the Vikings today. (Yes! I started the GB defense this week!) Adrian Peterson injured his knee thanks to an Al Harris helmet shot, but Jesus eventually rose and mad...

Budweiser's Right: The Browns Are So Good They Don't Even Need A Logo
Gus Johnson, calling that exhilarating Bills-Fins game today, just got done saying before the half that he thinks the Steelers are being slept on and that they could easily hang with the Patriots or Colts. DA says, "Suck on my Horse Balls, Gussy!" Browns 21, Steelers 9...

Settin' The One O'Clock NFL Table
Minnesota at Green Bay, FOX Last week, rookie sensation Adrian Peterson broke the single-game rushing record, picking up 296 yards and three touchdowns against the Bolts. So what can he possibly do for an encore? Well, personally I'm hoping to hear a "City Is Mine" or maybe an "Incarcerated Scarfac...

John Elway Should Be Free To Drink To His Heart's Content
The deification of John Elway in the Denver area is all-encompassing; we think Colorado might give Elway their presidential electoral votes just on general principle. Which is why we couldn't be more stunned: Someone cut off Elway from drinking at a bar!...

Mourning Your Grandmother Is Fineable Offense For Vikings
When we first heard that Minnesota Vikings wide receiver was being docked a game's pay for missing a game for his grandmother's funeral, we figured there had to be a catch. He had a history of skipping practice. He was generally an attitude problem. His grandmother was a Fascist. Something. But nope...

Clinton Portis Is Happily Weird Again
Via DC Sports Bog, which was invented for this very thing, it's Clinton Portis' newest "character." It's "Choo-Choo." We don't know what it means, and we don't care. It's like the final season of "Arrested Development;" not as inspired as the first go-arounds, but we're all just grateful it's back,...

Colts Can't Quiet Din Of Controversy
The search is on for the brave, mysterious security guard who blew the whistle on the Indianapolis Colts' apparent efforts to pipe in extra crowd noise in the RCA Dome on Sunday. It didn't take long for the team's house of lies to come crumbling down, once WBZ photojournalist Bryan Foley was on the ...

Dennis Dixon Takes Tougher Classes Than Matt Leinart
You might remember a couple of years ago, when everyone had their proverbial panties in a proverbial bunch about Matt Leinart taking only one class his senior year, ballroom dancing. This ultimately didn't turn out well for Leinart; all that extra time just gave him more impregnation opportunities. ...

Mark Mangino, Your Photo Gallery
We don't know about you, but we're entranced by Kansas coach Mark Mangino. He's like Rick Majerus, but less cartoonish. He looks like what we want football coaches to look like; sorry, ladies, but he's married!...

Well, Look Who's In Trouble Again
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was just reinstated to the NFL after an eight-game suspension. That's good. Police are already investigating him for another incident. That's bad....

The Detmer-Favre Rivalry Continues
The Vikings just signed Koy Detmer, and he very well might play this weekend against the Packers. I Dislike Your Favorite Team brings back this video of the last time Detmer and Brett Favre faced off....

Don Shula Will Assign You An Asterisk And You Will Wear It
We knew there was something missing from the NFL season: An asterisk controversy. Of course. Well let's get right to it. Don Shula — who coached the 1972 Miami Dolphins to the only unbeaten season in NFL history — says that the Patriots should get an asterisk if they finish 19-0 this season....

Michigan State Is Quite Fired Up About Michigan
Sticking with the Big Ten theme this morning, we'd like to note that new Michigan State football coach Mark Dantonio seems as unhinged as the infamous John L. Smith....

Bill James Has Really Let Himself Go
This is from over the weekend, but we weren’t here over the weekend, so we have to weigh in on this particularly entertaining Kansas fan....

Do Not Taunt The Detroit Lions
We don't believe it either, but the Detroit Lions are 6-2, with four winnable games coming up. What the heck is going on?...

When We Beer Bong Together, We Are One
In one of those, "Hey, look, opposing fans can all get along" stories, Kansas City and Green Bay fans come together to experience the Doc Ock. The guy wearing the Ahman Green jersey is our favorite....

If It's Too Loud, You're Too Young
There's not much to cheer about in Bronco land these days — did they really get hammered by the Lions? — but that doesn't mean the old folks can't have their fun....

This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...