Football Page 1553 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jesse Palmer's First Reviews Are In, And They're Not Good
There are so many reasons to dislike Jesse Palmer. Being a contestant on The Bachelor. Being Canadian. Being so ... handsome? And the worst part about him is that he just won't leave us alone, popping up in the darnedest of places. Like our dreams. Or, more universally, invading our aural space duri...
Previewing More Saturday Games, Just In Case Oklahoma Chokes
I'd like to go ahead and grant permission for those watching the games alone at home to start drinking. You might be wondering to yourself, "Hey, won't drinking at home alone mean I'm an alcoholic?" No, drinking before noon makes you an alcoholic, but let's not split hairs here. You have a full day ...
'Red River Shootout' Should Moisten Panties Just Fine
Those of you looking for that blatantly marquee matchup today are in for something special: The Big XII will take center stage today with the 103rd renewal of the Red River Shootout. Of course, now they've given the game this miffy, effeminate name of the "Red River Rivalry," which elicits the same ...
Kellen Winslow's Out With...Swollen Testicles?
After a summer filled with horrifying testicular injuries in hockey and baseball, it appears Cleveland Browns tight end Kellen Winslow is also having his own nut trouble and will possibly sit out Monday Night's game against the New York Giants. Pro Football Talk, quoting a league source, says that W...
College Football Preview: Texas and Oklahoma Is At NOON (EST) You Drunk Idiots
The biggest week of college football games comes at a good time. Your stocks are tanking, summer is fading, you may or may not get fired in the newest round of layoffs, and you're thinking about getting an MBA or going to law school but you're not sure whether it makes sense to take out the student...
Jerry Jones On Pacman Scuffle: Nothing To See Here. Move Along
First of all, I have a feeling that the movie Max Payne is going to make me want to punch someone myself. Just a hunch. That's evidently what happened on Wednesday with the Cowboys' Pacman Jones, who was at an event for the movie at a Dallas hotel which was also attended by rapper Ludacris and actor...
Mangino Will Not Tolerate Your Rob Schneider Movie Quotes
We turn now to the University of Kansas, where the struggle between Mark Mangino and Rob Schneider for the very soul of the Jayhawk football program has reached a tipping point. Kansas students have just received a mass email from student leaders which features a video of Mangino himself asking — na...
Kendra Wilkinson Will Skype Your Brains Out
First of all, Playboy Playmate Kendra Wilkinson appears to have broken it off with boyfriend Hugh Hefner (you drop to knees, scream "Nooo!"). And that means that she's free to romp around with the Eagles' Hank Baskett with impunity, although the two are rarely together due to their schedules. The so...
Thursday Night Preview: Clemson at (21) Wake Forest
Tommy Bowden and Clemson roll into lovely Winston-Salem to try and stave off yet another mediocre season. Clemson is 3-2 and coming off a 17-14 loss to Maryland. Now they're 2.5 point underdogs to Wake Forest. Watch this game to see if this is finally, at long last, the game that ends Tommy Bowden'...
Boys Will Be Boys
The Artist Formerly Known As "Pacman" Jones is in the middle of another troubling incident just a couple of months after his controversial reinstatement back into the NFL. The trouble-making defensive back was reportedly involved in a scuffle with his bodyguard early Wednesday morning that resulted ...
No Way McCain Loses Ohio Now
In politics it's known as the Brady Quinn Bounce, and John McCain has it. Our Cleveland Browns hero made a surprise appearance at a Strongsville, Ohio Republican rally on Wednesday (along with Browns lineman Joe Thomas), where he told enthusiastic McCain-Palin supporters at the Walter F. Ehrnfelt Re...
Well This Seems Rather Harsh
The "greater than" meme; so overworked and cliched that Combudsman Iracane banned it from this site more than a month ago. But over at ESPN, it's cutting edge. The Leader decided to use it in a hard-hitting feature about how Eli Manning has surpassed his brother as the more highly-regarded quarterba...
Thank You Brett Favre, For Teaching Us How To Laugh Once Again
Oh Brett Favre, you and your playful, backwoods prankster antics. In what passes as high-concept comedy in Mississippi and certain portions of Wisconsin, Favre pulled the hilarious gag of leaving a dead animal he had shot in the locker of a Jets teammate. Of course this hasn't been considered origin...
Don't Hassle The Hoch! Ed Hochuli Under Siege Once Again
This photo of Vikings linebacker Chad Greenway grabbing a large helping of Reggie Bush's facemask during the Monday night game was on the front page of the Saints' web site this morning; the franchise's way of protesting the fact that no flag was thrown on the play. The genius part of this is that n...
The Ballad Of Willie Williams
This story takes us way back to the year 2004 B.D. (Before Deadspin), and yes, sports existed even then. Back when a 19-year-old kid from Miami named Willie Williams was the most sought after football recruit in Florida and the Miami Herald figured, "Why not ask him to keep a diary of his on campus ...
Tennessee's Arian Foster Refuses Interview Requests Unless You Speak Pterodactyl
Sigh. The Vols are in the process of preparing for their road game at Georgia. A game that CBS had the misfortune of selecting. At least Jonathan Crompton isn't starting at quarterback for the Vols. You get the feeling that CBS' Gary Danielson might have refused to call another game quarterbacked b...
Brad Childress: Our Punter Is A Drooling Moron
Even though the Saints lost MNF due to the improbable late game heroics of Gus Frerrote and the missed opportunities of the Saints (Gramatica), most of the attention is focused on Reggie Bush and his ridiculous punt returns. Bush's 71-yard punt return to the end zone resulted in Vikings coach Brad C...
Oh, For The Days Of Rape And Murder Questions At Debates
The second Presidential debate is tonight, coinciding, quite helpfully, with the first night off of the baseball postseason. I spend about 45 percent of my workday reading political blogs from all sides of the spectrum, some conservative, some (OK, more) liberal, and absolutely none written by tha...
Cowboys Would Like All Those Press Meanies To Cut Them Some Slack
After losing to the Redskins and almost blowing a 17-point lead against the Bengals, Cowboys fans are understandably nervous and the press is beginning to bore in with uncomfortable questions. But the Cowboys would like you to know that this is very upsetting to them. It's a role that Jerry Jones' t...
Eli Manning's House Is Fully Automated; Kind Of Lame
Just say the words "New Jersey condo" and the thought immediately comes to mind; nothing was available in Manhattan? Hey, Eli Manning is quite happy with his new crib, and that's because he barely has to raise a finger when he's there; it's practically all automated. Here we see him in his den where...