Football Page 1586 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Suge Knight Gets His Bear Bryant On
A recent study from Merrill Lynch Investment Management took a look at how Americans are taking a new look at retirement. Essentially, they don't think retirement for today's baby boomers means empty decades of shuffleboard, cruise ships and tapioca; they see it as an opportunity, a way to reinven...
In The Wake Of Chad
We've always liked Jets fans, if just because they have that unique New York blend of bitter cynicism and unabashed homerism toward their team. They're like the woman who has nothing nice to say about her spoiled younger sister ... but she'll have your throat if you do....
Harris Interactive Poll Already On Its Death Bed
The Chicago Sun-Times noticed something that we found rather peculiar in college football's new "Harris Poll," designed to replace the Associated Press poll in the so-hated-by-everyone-you-almost-want-it-to-survive BCS standings: The 2-2 Illinois Fighting Illini, a team that lost 61-14 and gave up...
Fighting The Real Enemy: Fuchsia
From the Professors With Way Too Much Time On Their Hands Department: A professor at the University of Iowa has been receiving Internet threats after she claimed that the Iowa football team's propensity to color the locker room pink was sexist and homophobic. First off, we'd like to tell everyone ...
Football Outsiders Join The Happy Family Of Fox
Some Web business news this morning: The crazy kids at Football Outsiders have signed a deal with Fox Sports to provide NFL content for their site. Editor-in-chief Aaron Schatz — who previously had been doing work for ESPN Page 2 — says Fox Sports will run original FO content Monday-Wednesday. Fox...
NFL Roundup: Kickers Soak Up All The Drama
• Like everyone else who is prone to breaking their spine whenever there's a stiff wind, we've always had an affinity for kickers. So when Cowboys bully tackle Larry Allen went after former XFL kicker Jose Cortez after he missed an extra point — to be fair, Cortez got a little lipp — we cringed th...
Bob Knight's Kid Keeps Falling Upward
According to the Lubbock Avalanche-Journal — which has to be the strangest name for a newspaper we've ever seen — Texas Tech assistant basketball coach Pat Knight will succeed his father (his dad goes by "Bob") as the Red Raiders' head coach. We are wary of calling this eventual promotion "nepotis...
Giants Fans Remain Most Erudite In Sport
We once went to a St. Louis Cardinals-New York Yankees game at Yankee Stadium with a smattering of fellow Cardinals fans. There was a rain delay, and our group — all dressed in loud red, of course — watched the Bleacher Creatures amuse themselves, treating the benches like Slip-n-Slide's and parti...
Who Says Football Has Gay Undertones?
Ever wonder what goes on in the big pile of men that fall on a fumble in the NFL? (We're looking at you, Esera Tuaolo.) The St. Petersburg Times digs deep down to find out the truth about "football's underworld."...
The NFL's Phantom $5 Million
From a reader, about our inabilities to give money to the NFL Katrina Relief telethon:...
Showing Love For Texas Tech (And Yourself)
Great, great link from The Mighty MJD this morning: At Texas Tech, whenever the Red Raiders do something great during a football game, a certain student fan is supposed to ring a bell on the sideline like a madman. We're not sure why ringing a bell gets fans excited, but we don't understand lots o...
Donovan McNabb, White Quarterback
We're not Professional Sports Columnists, but we'd have to say, just to keep our noses clean, the last thing we'd mention when discussing Eagles QB Donovan McNabb would be race. We'd mention his hairline, his goatee, even his ridiculous commercials, but race? That's OK, thanks, we'll be over here ...
"Ditka 84, Bengals Negative-7"
With the Bears' convincing win over quarterback Corky Thatcher and the Detroit Lions, and a NFC North division that suddenly looks very winnable, we look to the Chicago Bears for the most reason anyone looks to the Chicago Fears: Da Fans. Bears fans might not be the most spirited fans in all of th...
The NFL Wouldn't Let Us Give Money
Like all of you, we're sure, we were moved and stirred by the NFL's selfless Katrina Telethon last night. John Elway, answering phones! Frank Gifford! Danny Kanell! We were touched by the willingness of such sainted former football players to roll up their sleeves and pitch in; they were answering...
NFL Does What It Can To Ape Jerry Lewis
Well, if you're excited about the doubleheader of NFL games tonight, you should stop it, because tonight is not about football, it's about the hurricane, so stop smiling and having fun and checking your fantasy team and enjoying the games. The NFL will have none of that....
Dead. Man. Walking.
We're watching Vikings coach Mike Tice on ESPN News right now, and it's making us sad. He started his press conference swaying back and forth, like a kid in desperate need of Ritalin, and in the next sentence, he compared his players to sailors vomiting off the side of a ship and called himself a ...
Laveranues Coles: Stepping Stone To A Gay Athlete?
Is Laveranues Coles' admission that he was sexually abused by his stepfather the equivalent of a professional athlete coming out of the closet as a gay man? We wouldn't think so, but OutSports' Cyd Zeigler Jr. says they're more similar than you think....
Mike Wallace's Dogged Pursuit For Truth
We will confess confusion about "60 Minutes" decaying muckraker Mike Wallace's strange obsession with Dolphins running back Ricky Williams. After his infamous interview last year — in which Wallace all but asked Ricky where he could score some good weed — last night's revisit with Williams consist...
NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...
The Real Randy Moss — MOSSMASK!
That, friends, is exactly what you think it is: an official Randy Moss collectible mask, ready to be delivered just in time for Halloween. It's the signature item of Randy's newly launched official Web site, which promises the "real" Randy Moss. You can join Randy's V.I.P. club — which, unlike The...