Donte Stallworth's Alien Friend Nicco

Donte Stallworth can comfortably be considered the "other" wide receiver on the Patriots. He doesn't have the blow-up-a-game talent of Randy Moss, and he doesn't have the electric, sensuous charisma of the sex bomb that is Wes Welker. It takes a bit for the man to stand out. It takes something dramatic. It takes an alien that lives inside his brain.

Well, inside his brain when he's on the field, anyway. The rest of the time he's on Mars.

Immediately after Mathis made the tackle, Stallworth pounded the ground and then started punching his legs as if they were defective. Stallworth said that was punishment from his alter ego, Nicco, whom Stallworth has described as an extra terrestrial being that resides on Mars when the receiver is off the field. "Yeah, that was him," Stallworth said. "That wasn't me."

Somewhere, likely Mars, right now Nicco and the great Farney are sitting and giggling, all a-twitter about their ongoing influence in the world of professional athletics. We wish them well and hope they will spare us when the inevitable invasion occurs.

Donte' Stallworth Has An Alien Alter Ego, Is Also Insane [FanIQ] Ryan Freel's Little Friend [Deadspin]