Football Page 1628 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jim Mora Jr. Might Still Be The Coach, And Michael Vick Might Still Be The Quarterback
The NFL Network is the broadcast home of tonight's Cowboys vs. Falcons game, which means, of course, that many of you can't see it. Which makes this open thread even more important ... it might just be the best live coverage of the game that you can get....
It Might Save Oregon Some Money To Just Give Everyone In The Crowd LSD
In their ongoing quest to burn the retinas of anyone who watches them, the Oregon Ducks have unveiled the newest part of their continually changing look: helmets that change color depending on the angle from which they are seen. I'm glad no one's told them about Hypercolor t-shirts....
I Wish You Wouldn't Kill Anthony Morelli
Penn State quarterback Anthony Morelli has received death threats via e-mail, for infractions way less severe than going to the Barbaro message board and wishing out loud that the horse would die. No, some jack-ass Penn State fans want him dead because he's only thrown for 2,227 yards and 10 touchdo...
Woody Paige Fingers Terry Glenn
If you were watching Around the Horn yesterday (just kidding, I know you weren't), you might have seen Woody Paige reveal the locker-room snitch that Terrell Owens told Michael Irvin all about. Owens said in the ESPN interview that someone inside the Dallas organization made it a point to tell the...
Columnist Pays Quincy Carter's Bail
You've probably heard by now about former Cowboys quarterback Quincy Carter's arrest yesterday. Carter was charged with possession of marijuana after police showed up for a complaint about a domestic disturbance....
Athletic Black Players Finally Run DeBerry Out Of Football
With three years remaining on his contract, Air Force coach Fisher DeBerry just announced that he won't be returning as coach of the Falcons. He has been coaching the team for 23 years and even won national coach of the year honors in 1985. Recently, he had fallen on hard times and many had accused ...
Florida Brings Back An Old Friend To Beat Buckeyes
So here's something that couldn't possibly go wrong. As Florida prepares for its BCS "Championship" Game against Ohio State, they are calling in the cavalry to help them get the win. They're so desperate for any advantage that they've even called in an old friend....
New Mexico's Quest For Newer, More Fertile Land
You know, we're starting to think that perhaps the Mexico family has some issues....
This Is Why He's Not Known As "Feelings" Johnson
Just because we've decided to wait just a little longer to get our arms around the Marcus Vick story, we take a brief hiatus with the tale of Bears defensive tackle Tank Johnson, previously one of our favorites because he has the name "Tank Johnson" entirely on the back of his jersey. We love that...
The Seahawks Are Falling Apart, Fast
So here's some hope for Seahawks fans. Think of yourselves as the St. Louis Cardinals....
The Seahawks Can Actually Win This Sullen Division
After a loss to the Buzzsaw last week that could generously be called "dispiriting," the Seattle Seahawks faithful are beginning to lose hope, openly referring to last season as a fluke. (We are more optimistic about their chances, but we know nothing.)...
All The Miami Stars Come Out To Idaho
So, tell us again how all these postseason bowl games are exciting their team's fans? As you might know, the Miami Hurricanes (hell2danaw!) are playing in the MPC Computers Bowl against Nevada this year. It's an appealing prospect; a game in Idaho. On New Years Eve. Sounds like a party....
More Empty Rooms Discovered In The Drafty Mansion That Is Terrell Owens' Mind
It's tough being Terrell Owens. Enemies are everywhere. There are secret documents to be decoded and then left in an isolated mailbox for government agents to pick up. Then there's all the time traveling with Darren Daulton. It's a lot of work....
Marvin Lewis' Reindeer Games
This has already made it around a bit, but because we're feeling festive and full of the holiday spirit this morning, so we thought we'd share this special video, put together to the tune of "Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer" — not typically one of our holiday favorites — and concerning Marvin Lewis an...
Joey Porter Didn't Mean To Offend You; He Just Meant To Offend The Fag
Just because his team has been a disaster this year doesn't mean that Steelers linebacker/insano Joey Porter can't still stir some shit up. Yesterday, Porter apologized for calling Kellen Winslow a "fag."...
Dan Marino, The Early Broadcasting Years
We'd never seen this old video, of Dan Marino, back in the Len Dawson "Inside The NFL" days, making a verbal flub and kind of getting a little pissy about it. (When you've scared Len Dawson, you've scared the world.) It's from 2000, when Marino was first trying out as a broadcaster — and was, and is...
Marvin Lewis Is Beginning To Suspect That Something Is Amiss
This is an intervention. Marvin Lewis, your team is out of control. One out of every eight Bengals players is involved in the U.S. judicial system; either in jail, on parole or awaiting trial. We'd really like you to read these pamphlets. There are people who can help....
Reeeeeeeeematchhh!!!!!
It was inevitable, it was preordained, it was destined and placed here only to make us happy and the world a better place: Looks like Miami and Florida International, who have a bit of history, are set to butt heads, crutches and Hell 2 Da Naw once again, next year. It's October 6. It's the Orange...
Big Ben Keeps Teaching The Kids
It was only a matter of time: Ben Roethlisberger's motorcycle mishaps are inspiring minor league promotions....
Troy Smith, Terror In The Skies
Troy Smith might be the Heisman Trophy winner, but you gotta be careful with that trophy. Some people might think it's a potential terrorist device....