NFL Page 873 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Counterpoint: Tom Brady Is One Of The Best Of All Time, Moron
I knew there would be a lot of shitty hot takes in the wake of yesterday's titanic Super Bowl. But I didn't know that the worst take of all would come from THIS VERY WEBSITE, from the otherwise perfectly reasonable Barry Petchesky. Barry is a Giants fan, so maybe his brain has been wadded up with ...
The Summer Of Gronk Has Officially Started
We're only in February, but the Summer of Gronk transcends seasons, and it immediately began after the Patriots' Super Bowl win last night. Here's pass-catching bicep Rob Gronkowski at the afterparty in the team's hotel doing some things with his arms to "I'm On One." Yes, he is wearing two hats b...
Watch Seahawks And Patriots Fans React To Game-Ending Interception
Via Reddit, here's a video compilation of fans' respective joy or despair as Malcolm Butler picked off Russell Wilson to clinch the Super Bowl for New England. We've all been there, at least in spirit, and on both sides....
Tom Brady Can Finally Relax
Tom Brady's not the greatest quarterback of all time, not even after winning his fourth Super bowl and third Super Bowl MVP, so cool it with that talk. But he's quite probably the most successful. And in a team sport that's disproportionately reliant on one position, especially in the game's curre...
Jermaine Kearse's Insane Super Bowl Catch, In Extreme Slow Motion
Jermaine Kearse completed one of the wildest catches in Super Bowl history, one that won't be remembered due to the inexplicable decision that followed. Here's our attempt to make the memory last just a bit longer; we recommend watching it in HD and fullscreen, just to take advantage of all the fa...
Here's Video Of Doug Baldwin's Flagged Touchdown Celebration
NBC might have cut away from Doug Baldwin's touchdown celebration, but this fan in the stands didn't. Now, let us debate: Is the Seahawk pooping the football, or laying it like an egg? This is surely the most pressing issue from last night's Super Bowl....
Anonymous Seahawk Blames Final Play Call On Anti-Lynch Conspiracy
It's important to try and understand the bone-deep despair that has no doubt infected the Seattle Seahawks before judging their postgame comments. A certain madness can come from a gut-punch like the one they suffered in the final seconds of Super Bowl XLIX, and that madness can lead to people sayin...
Pete Carroll Tries To Explain What The Fuck He Was Thinking
Here is Pete Carroll fumbling around an explanation for why he decided to throw against the Patriots on 2nd-and-1 from the one-yard line instead of unleashing Marshawn Lynch a couple of times. In the next day or two you will read hundreds of paragraphs about why it was a bad decision, but I think th...
I Can't Stop Watching This Psycho Local Ad About Heroin
This advertisement is an attempt to warn viewers of the dangers of heroin, and it aired during the second local break of tonight's Super Bowl broadcast in St. Louis. The Drug War fails again; this ad makes me want heroin really bad right now. Anybody else?...
Jeremy Lane's INT Came At A Cost: This Very Gross Injury
Please take our word for it. Don't click through to the rest of this post. You really don't want to....
Report: "Ball Boy" Who Took Footballs Into Bathroom Is An Elderly Man
The investigation into how numerous footballs used by the Patriots became deflated during the AFC Championship Game has focused on the Patriots-employed ball boy that took the balls from the referees locker room to the field. In-between he stopped off in what was at first ominously reported as "an...
Roger Goodell Refuses To Answer NBC's Questions
Roger Goodell threatened to fine Marshawn Lynch $500,000 if he didn't answer media questions this week. Let's all be surprised, then, that King Hypocrite refused NBC's request he answer their questions on-camera....
Puppy Bowl, Fish Bowl, Kitten Bowl: Counterprogramming The Super Bowl
The over/under for the number of households that will tune in to watch the Super Bowl tonight is 113 million. There has never been a larger event in the history of television. What I'm saying here is you don't have to be a fan of football to tune in. People who don't watch this Super Bowl will spend...
The Porn Movies You Could Be Watching Instead Of The Super Bowl
Most networks don't even bother attempting to program against the Super Bowl. But every channel has to air something, including your local cable provider's porn channels. Here's are the titles of porn movies airing on Time Warner Cable opposite the Super Bowl, according to today's TV Guide:...
Do The NFL's Anti-Domestic Violence Initiatives Actually Even Exist?
As long ago as it now seems, it was only this past July when Roger Goodell decided to suspend Ray Rice for two games after the Baltimore Ravens running back cold-cocked his future wife in an Atlantic City casino elevator. There was outrage, but not enough to change the NFL commissioner's mind. He ...
Marshawn Lynch's Outtakes From Gaming With Gronk Are Also Very Funny
Marshawn Lynch and Gronk played some video games on Conan's show the other day and it was great. Attempting to satiate an insatiable demand for all things Marshawn Lynch, Team Coco has uploaded a video of outtakes from the shoot, appropriately calling it "Marshawnisms." What's a Marshawnism? Probabl...
44 Lies Roger Goodell Told In His Press Conference Today
"It has been a season of amazing competition, challenges and real progress."...
How Will The Seahawks' Secondary Deal With Rob Gronkowski?
Richard Sherman might be the most vocal player in Seattle's hard-hitting, receiver-eating secondary known as the Legion of Boom, but he's far from the only key contributor. In fact, depending on his elbow's condition, Sherman might not even play a major part in the Hawks' gameplan. ...
J.J. Watt Has Retreated To A Cabin In The Woods To Become More Badass
Last year, Texans defensive end J.J. Watt spent his offseason crashing at his college buddy's house and basically doing nothing but working out. This year, Watt has decided that he needs to step his training up a bit, and so he's purchased a secluded cabin in the woods, where he will live and train ...
This Year's Super Bowl Teams Really Are The Best In Their Conference
Hey, here's a change. The participants in this year's Super Bowl, through the NFL's single-elimination playoff format, were actually the best in their respective conferences this year. That never happens! Except, uhm, when it happened last year. But otherwise—that almost never happens!...