Giancarlo Stanton Stroked Some Mighty Dongs

Giancarlo Stanton, the finest masher of taters in baseball, won the home run derby last night with a record 61 total home runs. He hit 18 of the 19 longest homers of the evening, and his 61 dingers traveled a total of 5.1 miles.
In the second round alone, Stanton donged six baseballs that flew over 480 feet. These dingers right here are the primo dingers (mobile users turn phone sideways or click here for video):
There are so many ways a home run derby can end up sucking—a bunch of weak jamokes put zeros on the board, Chris Berman won’t stop screaming, it lasts five hours—so it’s always nice when a slugger like Stanton rises to the occasion and turns an objectively dumb event into a real spectacle. I imagine even the most cynical baseball fans had a hard time not pumping their fists while watching Stanton put dents in the outfield seats.
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