Golf Page 138 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tiger Woods Still on Track to be a Billionaire by 2011
Even with the injured knee. This will make Woods the first sports billionaire. At least he doesn't have a hot swedish wife, or an island home, or a huge yacht that costs more than the GNP of Moldova. Then it might be kind of hard to root for the guy to make putts over man-boobed fifty year olds....
Jean Van de Velde Qualifies for British Open
Van de Velde, who memorably choked away the 1999 British Open with a triple bogey, was one of four golfers to qualify for next week's British Open. Even better for Van de Velde, he birdied the 18th hole to qualify....
Youth Golfers Get Blindsided By Boob-Infested Golf Outing
A golf team of pre-teen youngsters got a little more than they expected when they showed up for their junior club golf outing on Monday. Due to a scheduling "miscommunication" the lucky kids got to share the clubhouse with the annual Shotgun Willie's Charity Golf Tournament, an event sponsored by a ...
PGA Braces For A Year Of Living Tigerlessly
The PGA tour is now officially in trouble. Tiger Woods, athlete of the century, god amongst golfers and multi-blade razor pitchman, will have knee surgery to repair a torn ACL that will keep him out the rest of the 2008 season. Tiger, taking a break from having acrobatic intimate relations with his ...
After Three Holes ... Rocco Up By One Stroke
Former fat guy and poker aficionado Rocco Mediate almost had a hole in one on the third hole par 3. He ended up with a birdie and is even through three. Tiger bogey'd the hole after shot out of the bunker went 15 feet past the pin....
Some Monday Afternoon Championship Golf For You
The US Open playoff — and how cool is it that they make the two people who tie play another 18 holes the next day? — tees off in about 20 minutes. As Jason Sobel put it, it's Tiger's knee vs. Tiger's brain. Or, as we put it, it's Tiger's knee against Rocco Mediate's male pattern baldness. Don't worr...
Today We Honor All Middle-Aged Slightly Tubby Guys ... And Tiger Of Course
You know, you have to feel for Rocco Mediate. The guy staves off Tiger Woods all day, the best player in the world on his tail, a 46-year-old man playing the tournament of his life, and his reward is to go 18 more holes tomorrow against the guy. The goal should be survival at this point....
In Case You Forgot Why Tiger Woods Got To Marry A Swedish Model
Like many humans and corporate executives before him, Tiger Woods began his round of golf on Saturday with a double bogey. But unlike everyone else, he finished the back nine with two eagles and a birdie. Only Dick Cheney sets himself up in a better position to shoot more types of bird on a weekend...
Your Deadspin U.S. Open Preview
We don't know much about golf, but we do know that The U.S. Open Is Important. Therefore, with the Tiger Watch teeing off tomorrow, we asked resident golf impresario Shane Bacon, of Dogs That Chase Cars, to preview it for us. So here goes....
Golfing Hazards That Could Have Maimed A Small Population Of Tennesseeans
Just in time for Father's Day, the Hidden Valley golf course in Tennessee is doing some major upkeep on its course like bunker shaping, filling in deep barrancas, aerating and...bomb removal. Yes, hole number five of Hidden Valley had, according to bulldozer driver Freddie McGee, an "old tube-type b...
Hand Me The Pissing Wedge
Urologist Floyd Seskin developed the UroClub (as opposed to the Spaniard-bashing stick I invented, the EuroClub) for golfers who would like to relieve themselves without the long trip back to the clubhouse. It's made to look like a 7-iron and make you look like a tool. And it's yours for the low, l...
Who's Quitting Now? Annika Sorenstam, Among Others
Now this is the way to quit. Simple announcement, no ambiguity, definite schedule for withdrawal. Annika Sorenstam, who announced on Tuesday that she's leaving the LPGA Tour at the end of the season, is employing an exit strategy the Bush Administration is envying. Oh, and you can also bet that she'...
Revisiting The Worst Golf Round Of All Time
On ESPN.com yesterday, you might have read Jason Sobel's gory tale of the man man who shot a 66 on one nightmarish golf hole. (The 17th at TPC Sawgrass, if you're into that type of thing.) It's a terrifying tale, no less scary that we don't play golf. But then we recognized the last name of the gol...
Shout At The Dogleg
It's no secret that former hair metal icons began replacing their Aqua Net and sperm-killing lyrca with Tommy Bahama wardrobes as soon as most of them hit their 30s. Alice Cooper's like a five handicap, Tico Torres from Bon Jovi's 12.1, and, hey, even Tommy Lee's a 33....
It's Always Casual Monday With John Daly
When you're John Daly, you don't have to work particularly hard for media attention. And once you have that media attention, there's no real need to fancy yourself up for it; you're John Daly, dammit! Shoot, you don't even have to put on a danged shirt....
Some Guy Other Than Tiger Wins Masters
There's something inherently charming about the ceremony that follows a Masters Championship. For winning the most prestigious golf tournament, you don't get a trophy, or a plaque, or an oversized check. You win a jacket. Here, friend, congratulations; have a jacket. Stay warm, friend....
Let's Get Ready to Clap Politely!
Welcome fwends, to our coverage of Sunday at the Masters. The leaders are underway, and already Immelman (-10) and Snedeker (-8) have given a stroke back to the field (which is struggling a bit itself). Continue after the jump a breakdown of the leaders and contenders, as well as an updated leaderb...
I'm Not Your Fwend, Buddy
You see, she's dressed like that because it was... raining. Forget all of that, the rain is gone and everybody is on the course in Augusta. Jim Nantz just called me his friend, so you know we're ready to go. Defending champion Zach Johnson is putting together the round of the day, but all his -4 ro...