Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.

Apparently 2,400 Deadspinners had nothing better to do yesterday than vote in the Name Becks' Reality Show Contest and apparently I had nothing better to do than check the results every three minutes. First of all, a word to all of you would-be poets who cleverly rhymed Bend with Spend for Spend It Like Beckham: Congratulations, you're now officially headline writers for People Magazine. In 2003.


For those of you who went for the cheap gay jokes, Will's friend John Rocker would like you to join his fantasy league — or Scientology. But kudos to Big Daddy Drew who for a few seconds turned his head from checking out Payton Manning's basket to write Gay, Straight AND Taken. As soon as the Super Bowl is over, Big Daddy will return home to a lavish array of prizes that will no doubt find their way to E-Bay where he will — wait for it — Vend It Like Beckham. Next up: Who will play Warren St. John in the Fugees movie? I say Adrian Grenier.


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