Hockey Page 549 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fun With Facial Hair!
One of our favorite subplots of every NHL playoffs slate is the growing of a playoff beard. Because we didn't start puberty until we were 26, we still cannot grow a beard — honestly, we're barely a mammal — so we look at the tradition with envy. A solid playoff beard can foster team unity or, in a p...
NHL Eastern Conference Playoff Pants Party
Now that you have your playoff beards and your Molson, you should be ready for some NHL Stanley Cup Playoff action. One of the reasons we love the NHL Playoffs is that it's possible for games to last eight hours. At the end, everyone dies. Fun to watch....
Ladies And Gents, It's The NHL Playoffs
And you thought we forgot about hockey! Canuck, please!...
The Rangers Spit On Cute Girls
When there's a commercial break — yes, the NHL has sponsors! Pipe down, you! — the New York Rangers Islanders have Ice Girls clean up loose ice around the goal. They're young and cute and the fans like them, because fans like young and cute girls who are on ice....
Yeah, About That Versus Deal ...
Far be it from us to imply that the NHL might have made a mistake aligning itself with a network as shaky as Versus, but ... well ... it's not a good sign when your network might be pulled off cable right before the playoffs....
Simon Avoids The Hoosegow, And Other NHL True Crime Stories
Look, if your average office cubicle dweller went looking for trouble with a hockey stick down at Dunder-Mifflin, things would probably have turned out differently. Dwight taking a hack at Kevin's neck with a large, ax-shaped weapon most likely equals jail time. Chris Simon doing basically the same ...
Don't Give Ken Griffey Jr. Any Ideas
We've got a little bit of time before the tournament action gets underway, so let's kill time with hockey. Ted Nolan, head coach of the New York Islanders got a little creative (or uncreative, I guess) by listing Rick DiPietro as suffering from "general body soreness."...
NHL To Simon: Pack Your Crap And Get Out
Because we've never really shown it, here's the tomahawk chop by the Islanders' Chris Simon on the Rangers' Ryan Hollweg from Thursday. After mulling the attack over the weekend, the NHL doled out a 25-game suspension for Hollweg for thrusting his neck at Simon in a vicious manner. Or, no, the other...
Hey, Hockey Players: Ever Heard Of Gmail?
You know what's not a good way for a players' union to inspire its members and players to trust them? Sneaking in and reading their emails....
... Or, As The NHL Calls It, 'Thursday'
For those who like their NHL violence varied and wanton, we present Thursday's Ottawa at Buffalo matchup, which makes the Spanish Inquisition look like a tickle fight. The Sabres' 6-5 OT win featured 100 total penalty minutes, with eight penalties for fighting, four for hooking, two for instigating ...
One Sign You Definitely Can't Bring In The Rink
There are about three or four funny things happening in this 30 second clip from a commercial break during a San Jose Sharks NHL game. Here's how we rank them....
Not A Sign That Will Help You Get On TV
Just to get your wind down your Tuesday afternoon with a little crass, lowest-common-denominator business, here's a sign from a Pittsburgh Penguins game the other evening....
It's Some Sort Of All-Star Thing Tonight
If it's 8 p.m. on Versus on a Wednesday night in the middle of Super Bowl week ... well, jeez, it must be time for the NHL All-Star Game! Because of the NHL's shenanigans, we won't be seeing Rory Fitzpatrick, but we will be seeing a bunch of other people you similarly do not know. Excitement!...
Final Proof (Mostly): The NHL Rigged The All-Star Vote
Eric McErlain told us last week, and now Slate, in an Investigative! Report!, confirms it: The Rory Fitzpatrick vote was rigged by the NHL, assuring that he would not make the All-Star Team....
Vote For Rory Falls Short; Is There Something (Ice) Fishy Going On?
So, as we mentioned yesterday, the Web campaign to vote Vancouver Canucks defenseman Rory Fitzpatrick into the NHL All-Star Game fell just short, finishing in third place after once climbing near the very top. Fitzpatrick took it in stride — considering some NHL players and analysts were acting as i...
Here's To All That Gorgeous Snatch in FLA
The headline is a quote from Slap Shot, which is both a hockey movie and the first thing I think of when anything hockey-related comes to my attention. The clip is a remarkable sequence from a Thursday night game where Patrik Stefan blew the equivalent of a 2-inch putt, and the commentator acted lik...
Vote For Rory Campaign Proving Frighteningly Successful
So ... Rory. Rory Fitzpatrick, the write-in candidate for the NHL All-Star Game that has become a Web cause celebre, is moving up the charts. How much? He's currently No. 2 among Western Conference Defensemen, ahead of Nikolas Lidstrom and just behind Scott Niedermayer. That would put him in the sta...
Rory Continues To Sneak Up NHL All-Star Ballots
So you know how the big NHL Web movement right now is to vote Canucks defenseman Rory Fitpatrick into the All-Star Game as a write-in candidate? Well, the movement is gaining considerable traction; the newest vote totals from NHL.com show Rory in a rather solid fifth place, with 144,819 votes. Prett...
You, Too, Can Vote For Rory
As is made plain and obvious around here every day, we don't have the most fundamental understanding of hockey. We love hockey, particularly in person, but with everything that has went on the last few years, it's difficult to keep up. We know, we apologize and we're trying....
NHL 94 Was More Complicated Than You'd Think
For those of a certain age, no video game had more cultural impact — and was played so often under the influence of MadDog 20/20 — than NHL '94. Contrary to popular opinion, it's not the game they're playing in Swingers; sadly, they had already eliminated the bleeding option by then, thus decreasi...