Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Horrible New Uniforms Mean Notre Dame Can Finally Compete With The Marylands Of The World

Illustration for article titled Horrible New Uniforms Mean Notre Dame Can Finally Compete With The Marylands Of The World

Here, courtesy reader @bobbyleecoy, are the uniforms Notre Dame will wear when the Fighting Irish lose to Miami in Chicago on Oct. 6. And while I'm a Notre Dame hater like the rest of you, even I can't begin to process the sartorial insult these things are to the school's decaying football tradition.

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It's as if Northwestern's uniforms and West Virginia's uniforms had a Roman orgy. And it's utterly fitting that Brian Kelly—the rich man's Randy Edsall—would endorse playing in a uniform that makes Notre Dame look like the world's most desperate program. This is the uniform equivalent of a leather halter top. I look forward to Notre Dame players working your local street corner at 3 a.m., doling out toothy blowjobs for $10 bucks a pop.

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Maybe these uniforms will again help Mike Golic moisten his radio partner.

[South Bend Tribune]

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