Sure, it's a little early—unless you're Jewish—but everyone's favorite NBADL mascot would like to wish you a happy and healthy Non-Denominational Holiday Time ... with visions of unspeakable horror dancing in your heads.

Deadspin operative Rob G. spotted this Fort Wayne-themed beauty at Indiana's annual Festival of Trees. Also, known as "Indiana." Seriously, they love their trees down there.

If that doesn't help you fall asleep on Christmas Eve, I don't know what will.

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Thank you for continued support of Deadspin. Tomorrow, the one and only Stev D steps into the breach for his Weekend Daddy debut. Two words of advice, pal: Never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut ... unless you think it will get you pageviews. Then fire away.


Sunday: Idiot Barking Dog. Enjoy the weekend, but be good, for goodness' sake.