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Lance Armstrong Puppy Updates!

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Remember back when ESPN was actually providing updates on the health of Lance Armstrong's dog? Well, we can't just blame them anymore; the Associated Press has take up the cause of Lance's puppy, which was apparently born with a defective valve in its heart, as if any of you could possibly care.

We imagine someone in either Armstrong's or Sheryl Crow's camp screaming at a poor intern to keep faxing out press releases updating the world on the health of the inventively named Rex. But the real best part of the story:

Chris Orton, who heads the hospital s cardiac surgery team, performed the valve replacement operation on Rex. He says the puppy is through the most critical stages of the procedure but will remain on blood thinner for the next three months.

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That's right: Armstrong's dog is now on blood thinners. You know what? We bet there isn't even a dog at all.

Armstrong's Puppy Has Heart Surgery [MSNBC]
ESPN Has Derailed [The Mighty MJD]

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