Locker Page 1187 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Damn Nature, You Majestic: Kayaker Gets A Visit From A Blue Whale
A kayaker off of Los Angeles's Redondo Beach came prow to rostrum with nature's gentle giant, the blue whale. Kayaking is a sport, and my first grade teacher Mr. Moy gave me an unhealthy love of whales, so here it is....
Bryant Gumbel Drops One Little Plantation Metaphor, And Everybody Loses Their Shit
You'll notice that Bryant Gumbel never once used the s-word in his criticism of David Stern last night. His extended analogy called the players "hired hands," which ought to put the lie to any suggestion that actual, literal slavery was being evoked. That hasn't stopped the usual backlash that comes...
MLB's Fun Police Bans Dirk Nowitzki From Throwing Out First Pitch At A World Series Game
From Marc Stein: "Sources told ESPNDallas.com that—with the NBA in the midst of a lockout that has spanned 111 days—at least some hesitation stems from the idea that MLB executives want to stand behind their basketball counterparts and have notified the Rangers that they can't bestow first-pitch hon...
Memphis Could Sue The NBA If It Doesn't Get Its Shit Together
In America, if you're not getting what you need quickly enough, there is always a simple back-up plan available: go to court, tie everything up in paperwork and bureaucracy, and end up with a settlement. It's almost one of our golden rules. And so it's almost a surprise that, with lockouts straining...
Here's Video Of Bryant Gumbel Calling David Stern A "Modern Plantation Overseer" On HBO's Real Sports Last Night
"His moves are intended to do little more than show how he's the one keeping the hired hands in their place." [The Basketball Jones, via Pro Basketball Talk]...
How To Win A 10-Man Battle Royal Inside A Home Depot
Your letters:...
A Brief Dialogue Between Reporter And Athlete That Exposes The Fundamental Hypocrisy Of College Sports (Or Not)
This comes via the Seattle/Tacoma Fox affiliate. Keith Price is the quarterback for the Washington Huskies. Steve Kelley is a columnist for the Seattle Times. The exchange takes place in the aftermath of Washington's victory on Saturday over Colorado....
Presenting A Picture Of Chad McGhee Signing A Young Knox City Greyhounds Fan's Forehead
We'll be catching up with Chad McGhee later in the week to get more details about last night's Knox City Showdown charity event. However, if you can't wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to hear how his bout with Coach Charles "The Animal" Steele went, the good folks at the Abilene Reporter-News were k...
Today In Pollyannaish Things Written About The NBA Lockout: Only Michael Jordan Can Save Us
Here is the thing that's sometimes hard to grasp when games are being canceled and no end is in sight: everybody wants the lockout to end. No one is actively being greedy or selfish just because they hate you and don't want you to watch basketball. Both sides have demands and one side or both are go...
A Not-At-All Homoerotic Tribute To Shoulder Pads
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Pete Carroll Pleads With LeBron, Because Apparently The Seahawks Need His Help To Underachieve
Your morning roundup for Oct. 13, the day we learned just how dangerous some sex toys can be. Photo via @PeteCarroll. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Here's Chad McGhee With Your Weekly Knox City Greyhounds Update And Bye-Week Wrestling Extravaganza
The mighty Knox City Greyhounds scrapped back to within a game of .500 on this roller coaster of a season with a resounding 56-8 over pathetic Vernon Northside. It wasn't all lollypops and unicorns, superfan Chad McGhee reported earlier today, though....
The Delayed Start Of The NBA Season Gets The Taiwanese Animation Treatment
In Taiwanese animators's perception of the current NBA lockout, commissioner David Stern wields a chainsaw, cries when the Detroit Pistons flat-line in a hospital bed, guards Derek Fisher and gay marries Time Warner Cable. Also, LeBron James wears a lil-boy crown and gets shattered-backboard dunke...
Good One, MLB
Well played. [via HBT]...
Shoe Review: 361 Degrees Of Kevin Love
This is a new regular feature in which we'll take a look at recent sneaker releases....
Was Steve Jobs A Glory Hog?
Before we get to the Funbag, a quick reminder that I will be at New York Comic Con on Friday morning, hosting the "Zombies, Fallen Angels, and Other Paranormals" panel in Room 1A23 at the Javits Center. What's that? You were going to go to the Final Fantasy XIII-2 panel? What are you, some kind of f...
Let The NBA Lockout Last Forever; Drew Gooden's Got Chicken Wings To Sell
The Bucks' Drew Gooden is opening four new Wingstop restaurants in the Orlando area. "I did lot of research on different franchises," he says, before admitting he really wanted to own a Five Guys Burgers but there were none available. Wings are good too. [Orlando Business Journal]...
SprtsCntr: Winning Over Hearts, Minds, And Hannah Storm's Fist
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....
If You Ever Get Chased By A Wild Turkey, Run (And Also Keep The Camera Rolling Like This Brave Lady)
Duffy Kelly, a producer for News10 in Sacramento, ventured out into the suburban wild recently to see if—as a few of her neighbors had claimed—her local wild-ish turkeys attack. She didn't realize that she was walking straight into a horror film (one in which the villain is a mostly harmless game ...
Kenyon Martin Would Like All Of His Haters To "Catch Full Blown AIDS And Die!"
A veteran of 11 NBA seasons, Kenyon Martin has no doubt encountered a hater or two in his travels throughout the league. One might thus assume he's conditioned himself to keep whatever negativity that gets hurled his way from truly bothering him. But one would be wrong....