Locker Page 1218 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When You Wear A Self-Sexually Suggestive Hockey Sweater, People Make Assumptions
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Mike Mayock’s Lisp Will Captivate America
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Last Night's Winner: Blake Griffin's Potential Becomes Kinetic
Last night's Heat-Clips game was noteworthy not for Heat-Clips, but for Heat-Blake Griffin. The best team in basketball against a throwback to a more physical era. So young, so monstrous. He did not disappoint, although he eventually must....
Brook Lopez Curses Out Someone On His Team
Lopez was subbed in with three minutes left in a 3-point game. He missed a jumper and was promptly removed for Derrick Favors. He was not happy, we presume with Avery Johnson. [h/t Ben]...
T-Wolves Notch 5 Technicals In 10 Seconds
This video has everything: a power-mad ref (and hometown boy!), Manu sinking four straight free throws, and the emergence of Angry Darko....
Is It Time To Admit LeBron Was Right To Get Out Of Cleveland?
Since November 29th, the Heat are 21-1, while the Cavaliers have gone 1-21. This was the team we expected him to stick around and fruitlessly try to win with?...
ARCO Arena's New Name Will Be A Glorious Tribute To Large-Scale Consumer Fraud
ARCO will become the Placebo Effect Power Balance Pavilion, according to Sactown Royalty. You are, of course, familiar with Power Balance and its wristbands. This is like naming your stadium in honor of pet rocks. [Sactown Royalty]...
The Fundamental Rule Of Public Masturbation
If you're at a gym and you put your shit in a locker and you don't put a lock on that locker, don't you deserve to have all your shit taken out of that locker and burned in front of you? I say yes. Nothing worse than a seemingly available gym locker that turns out to be taken by some shithead who ca...
John Salley Story Corner: Spider Misses The Bus
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: an elaborate ruse to avoid being late....
Last Night's Winner: Donald Sterling, Looking At Those "Beautiful Black Bodies"
Another day, another headlong plunge into the creepy racial and sexual dynamics of Donald Sterling's id. At this point, it's hard to shake the feeling that Sterling goes through life thinking he's perpetually in the back row of a Pussycat Theater....
The Cruel Bastard’s Way To Fix Pass Interference
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Tony Allen Whupped O.J. Mayo Over A Gambling Debt
Allen and Mayo got into a scrape on the team flight home Monday, over, what else, a card game. At least no one pulled a gun this time....
"Golden Radio Voice" Guy Has A Job Offer From The Cavs
Columbus, Ohio, homeless man Ted Williams, which is American for "Susan Boyle," apparently has been offered a home and a job doing voiceover work for the Cavs. Dreams do come true, America, just so long as they go viral first. [Business Insider]...
Walt Frazier Is Explaining And Splatter Painting
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Gilbert Arenas To J.J. Redick: "We're The Two Best White Shooters In The NBA"
This really is an amazing quote, and I have no idea what it means. Some points to consider:...
LeBron Bashed For Saying Good Things About His Coach Now
Erik Spoelstra was named Eastern Conference coach of the month after the Heat's turnaround. LeBron responded. Not since Descartes, or perhaps Clinton, have so few words been vivisected so utterly and completely....
Is Being A Best Man Overrated?
Before we get to the funbagginess, today marks the five-year anniversary of the first blog post I ever wrote....
The Wonderful World Of Twitter Prostitutes, Starring Ronny Turiaf And Ms. Candy Deepthroat (UPDATE)
Twitter has opened up a whole new world where skirt-chasers and jersey-chasers can pursue each other with a minimum of fuss. At least until the girl puts the athlete on blast....
Phil Jackson Says Allegedly Mean Thing About Kobe Bryant In Language Resembling English
The Sporting News thinks Kobe and Phil Jackson are now trading "barbs." I dunno. Maybe this sounded a lot more cutting in the original Swedish?...
Nick Van Exel's Son Is Free On Bail
Two days after being arrested for murder in Dallas, Nickey Maxwell Van Exel is a free man whose lawyer claims murder is a harsh term for "horseplay." Bail was originally $1 million; NMVE only had to post $25,000....