Locker Page 1225 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Heat Strokes, Game 9: Rethinking The Big Three
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Blake Griffin Falls Victim To Shake Weight Menace
Prior to last night's Clippers-Spurs game, Blake Griffin was spotted in the Clips' locker room using a Shake Weight, 2010's funniest piece of exercising equipment. It's funny because things that remind people of penises are funny. You see?...

Happy Veterans Day! Here Are Some Really Happy Dogs Welcoming Soldiers Home
Inspired by the smart folks at mental_floss, we've put together a little video in observance of Veterans Day: a compilation of excited dogs greeting their owners upon their return from basic training or service overseas....

The Confessions Of A Misery Voyeur: Your Guest Jamboroo
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Our own Katie Baker is filling in for him this week....

Gilbert Arenas Opens Up About Crapping In People's Shoes
In January, in a Gilbert Arenas feature for the Washington Post, Mike Wise and Michael Lee casually noted that Gil, a renowned locker room prankster, "once defecated in teammate Andray Blatche's shoe." It's brushed over pretty quickly and the article moves on....

A Very Special Edition Of The Funbag: Your Questions, Answered By A Woman!
Good afternoon! I'm taking a brief break from lady-wrangling over at Jezebel so that I may have the pleasure of filling in for Drew today. Because while his funbags are considerable, mine are better....

Lonely Jose Canseco Would Like You To Call Him To Talk About His Life
310 862 6309 I am ready for you call me now let's talk.you will be charged a small fee half of it will go to a charity Remember the "charity" is most likely "The Lonely Jose Canseco Fund." [Twitter]...

Heat Strokes, Game 8: The Haters' Wet Dream
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Last Night's Winner: The Indiana Pacers' <em>NBA Jam</em> Third Quarter
When a player gets a hot hand in basketball, whether through the sheer gully-ness of Mark Price in NBA Jam or a real example, it's a sight to behold. When a whole team gets a hot hand, it's a much different phenomenon....

Set Your Sights High, Wizards Fans
Owner Ted Leonsis: "Had we won a close game at home on Saturday, we would be playing on Wednesday for a .500 record...A 2-3 record would qualify for the playoffs if they started today." Dream the impossible dream, Washington. [Ted's Take]...

Introducing Your Fill-In Funbagger
Jezebel's Jessica Coen, who is herself something of a poop authority, is handling this week's Funbag. It'll run tomorrow. Unburden yourself to her at [email protected], subject "funbag."...

Young Philip Rivers Did Not Make Funny Faces, Apparently Wanted To Play For The Bears
"I discovered I went to elementary school with Phillip [sic] Rivers (he's 2 years older)," wrote commenter Gottliebs Cards. "If anyone is interested I'll scan some pics." Interested? You bet your ass we're mildly kind of halfway interested....

Theo Walcott Is A Published Author Of Children’s Literature
Inspired by the heroes in his favourite bedtime stories, Arsenal striker Theo Walcott, aged 9¾, has written a series of kids’ books whose lead character is loosely based on the forward himself....

Heat Strokes, Games 6 & 7: The Shape Of Pizazz To Come
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

All Record-Breaking Surfer Kelly Slater Needs Are Some Tasty Waves And He's Fine
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Oh Look, There Are Mildly-Interesting NBA Stories That Don't Involve LeBron James
So, there's apparently an effort to turn the Sacramento Kings into the Kentucky Kings....

John Salley Story Corner: Sleeping With The Enemy
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: A sister does her dirt....

Chinese Football Coach Studies Genitals In Order To Find The Next Messi
We've checked our calendar and apparently it's not April 1st for a while yet. Still, that hasn't stopped Chinese newspaper Yangtze Evening Post running a story on a new scouting method for young Chinese football stars — genital assessment....

Wizards Owner Will Dougie If A Game Sells Out
Ted Leonsis promises to emulate John Wall's Dougie if the Wiz have just one sellout. A sellout is not like making the playoffs or Andray Blatche earning his contract; this is a doable thing. [Ted's Take]...

Cleveland Responds To The LeBron Commercial
Cleveland, or someone representing Cleveland who produces videos, is still really upset about LeBron James leaving for a state that has great weather and no state income tax, so they have put together this video response to James's new commercial....