Locker Page 1279 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Miserable Stephon Marbury Gives Thanks to Knicks by Ripping D'Antoni's Dog-Walking Skills
The Knicks are quietly stumbling toward legitimacy this season under Mike D'Antoni, but still can't seem to peacefully rid themselves of the one player who embodies their past failures, Stephon Marbury. D'Antoni even extended an olive branch toward Steph by offering him a starting job, but that didn...
Jamboroo, Week 13. THANKSGIVING EDITION, In Which Chad Ocho Cinco Tells You The Story Of The First Thanksgiving
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available in stores and online here, and makes a lovely Christmas gift for the chronic masturbator in your life. You...
Programming Note: It's Turkey Jamboroo Day Tomorrow (And Ray's Doing the Carving)
Last year, we ran a Thanksgiving edition of the NFL Jamboroo the day before Thanksgiving. But we're gonna forgo that this year and run the Jamboroo early tomorrow morning. Why? Well, for one thing, there isn't fucking jack SHIT to do on Thanksgiving morning. You watch the parade for two minutes, yo...
Is The NHL Gaining On The NBA (Again)?
You may have missed this in the Friday afternoon "please let this week be over" crunch, but it's not too late to read this important post over at Puck Daddy. Well, important if you care about the friendly rivalry between delusional NBA apologists and bitter NHL pedants. Believe it or not, there was ...
The Legend Of Scotty Brooks
As you may be aware—if anyone can ever truly be "aware" of Oklahoma City basketball—the Thunder fired head coach P.J. Carlesimo on Friday, because frankly ... the beard has seen better days. More importantly, he has been replaced on an interim basis with a name I thought I might never hear again—Sco...
The Thunder Lose To The Hornets, Take Two
Chris Paul had a triple double in the Hornets 109-97 win over the Thunder. With 29 points, 16 assists and 10 rebounds, Paul had help from David West who scored a season-high 33 points. Oklahoma City, who fired their coach P.J. Carlesimo Saturday was playing under the guidance of interim coach Scott ...
Vince Carter's Your Daddy
Vince Carter bitch slapped his former team, scoring 39 points, hitting a game-tying three at the buzzer, and reverse dunking in the Nets 129-127 OT win over Toronto. The loss was bittersweet for the Raptors' Chris Bosh who finished the game with 42 points. New Jersey's Devon Harris contributed his o...
Ron Artest Speaks the Awful, Unvarnished Truth
It's pretty rare to have an interview with Ron Artest that isn't entertaining, but the one he did in the latest issue of "King" magazine is unbelievably candid. Writer Thomas Golianopoulos was a former elementary school classmate of Artest's back at P.S. 122 in Astoria Queens, which evidently gave h...
Jamboroo, Week 12. Featuring: Fire-Eating Strippers, Hidden Poop Éclairs, and Pornographic Liechtensteinian Christmas Carols
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available right now in stores and online here, and makes a lovely Christmas gift for the chronic masturbator in your...
Will The Real Shaq Twitter Feed Please Stand Up?
This story involves technology and is written by an old person, so try to bear with me as I attempt to follow along. A few weeks ago, someone started using Twitter under the name Shaquille O'Neal. Everyone was all in a tizzy, until it was revealed that the person behind it was not really O'Neal. Fin...
George Karl Does Not Miss Allen Iverson
So how is that Allen Iverson for Chauncey Billups trade working out? Funny you should ask! The Nuggets are 5-1 since adding Billups. The Pistons are just 3-3 with A.I., but they did win three straight on the road and gave the Los Angeles Lakers their first loss of the season. So everyone's happy, ri...
Scot Pollard Enjoys Showing Off His Championship Ring
Hey look, everyone! There's former Celtics superstar(?) and current free agent Scot Pollard showing off his championship ring the only way he knows how: by making sure his other useless fingers are out of the way and huddled inside his fist, allowing him to raise his important middle finger loud an...
Where Brotherly Love Happens
Philadelphia 94, Indiana 92 - Sixers guard Kareem Rush briefly matched up with his younger brother Brandon Rush last night (pictured) in Indiana. It was the first time two brothers played each other in an NBA game since the infamous 1965 game in which Wilt Chamberlain played his younger brother, Arc...
0-16 Is Upon Us. Jamboroo, Week 11, Featuring King Diamond, Poop, And Mongolian Wok
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available RIGHT FUCKING NOW in stores and online here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK. The...
Everybody Was Shaq Fu Fighting ...
A donnybrook in which Yao Ming squares off against Steve Nash, practically everyone else gets involved in the scuffling, and then Shaq runs in and starts throwing people around like Andre the Giant? Why didn't someone tell me that Wednesday's Rockets-Suns game was going to be so much fun? Video belo...
Carmelo Anthony Might Be Losing More Than Just Allen Iverson
Other than the fact that he's famous, fabulously wealthy, and can dunk on Jerome Williams, Carmelo Anthony has a lot in common with people like you and me. We all love soup, the outdoors, talking and not talking. I mean, we could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about. You ...
A Little Trash Talk For Your Tuesday
First, the reasons Kevin Garnett's taunting actions here are a big bowl of wrong: the finger-waving gestures you see in the stills and in the video below are from the movie Bring It On. What? Kevin Garnett is a 15-year-old girl? Also, after all that tongue-wagging and gesturing, Jose Calderon whistl...
Iverson's Piston Debut Pist On By Nets, 103-96
Allen Iverson is 33. As in "years old." He has five kids and a wife and, we would assume, a sense of mortality towering over what remains of his career in professional basketball. The player who unwittingly personified the perceived me-first player mentality of the post-Jordan NBA surely realizes th...
If They've Named It 'The Cage Of Death,' You Know It's Safe
There are many times in life when you're justified in saying 'I'm not getting in there.' The Raiders' Black Hole immediately comes to mind, as do the restrooms at Ralph Wilson Stadium. And I've also pretty much made it a rule never to allow myself to be submerged amongst enormous, hungry crocodiles;...
Fox Attack Victim Courageously Steps Forward With Harrowing Tale Of Survival
The identity of the Prescott, Ariz. fox attack victim has finally been revealed. Here is Michelle Felicetta, who agreed to step forward today so that her harrowing tale might serve as a warning to others who travel in fox-infested areas. We caution you that the details of her ordeal are not for the ...