Locker Page 1341 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

No Draft Dodgers Around Here
One thing anyone watching the NBA Draft tonight should be ready for? Many extreme closeups of Adam Morrison's mustache, inexplicably the centerpiece of NBA Live '07's advertising campaign. You've all been warned....

Darko, Way Back When
As we prepare for the NBA Draft tonight, we encourage you to keep in mind that, well, nobody knows anything. Need proof? This pre-2003 draft video looking at the "unlimited potential" of Darko Milicic....

Championship Parades Are No Fun
We've always wondered what it would be like to go to a championship parade for one of our favorite teams, but every time we get excited about the notion, the bastards go and, say, lose eight games in a row and ruin it for us. But still. We imagine it Albert Pujols riding by in a float, throwing us c...

You Should Probably Just Be Visiting TrueHoop Today
We'll have more NBA Draft preview stuff later today, but until then, we happily show off this photo from The Realests, which we can guarantee you showed up on the dorm wall of some happy Washington Jesuit....

Cultural Oddsmaker: Isiah And The Knicks
A.J. Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Send him all kinds of fan mail....

Looking At This Year's Draft ... Four Years From Now
Excellent conceit from excellent Golden State Warriors blog today: A look at what we'll be saying about upcoming NBA Draft prospects in 2010....

The Moment You've All Been Waiting For
Ladies and gentlemen, this man — this guy — has been rewarded for the job he has done over the last three years. Larry Brown has been fired, and Isiah Thomas — Isiah Thomas! — will take over as coach and general manager....

Mark Cuban's Relaxation Techniques
Our affection for Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban is well-documented, and we certainly don't mean to pile on during what's assuredly a difficult day for him. But nevertheless, we wouldn't be doing our job if we didn't show off these photos sent to us this morning, supposedly taken last Friday nigh...

The Faces Of Champions
That's right, folks, the wait is over: Antoine Walker, Shandon Anderson and Michael Doleac are finally champions....

Heat Win First-Ever Title, And Even Cuban's Classy About It
Even though their apparently show their loyalty by dressing up like Klan members — even when they're not actually at the arena in which the games are being played, like in this picture — and even though they don't have an owner whose brain is always on the verge of a noisy (and always smart and en...

And Without Any Further Blowups ... Game 6
Difficult to add much more to everything else that's out there: It's Game 6, the Heat are a game away from winning the NBA Title, Mark Cuban is $250,000 lighter and downright dog-nutty, Dwyane Wade getting his legend on and the referrees looking over their shoulders, making sure no one's got a shi...

Is Mark Cuban Going Insane?
We feel we have to legitimately ask: Is Mark Cuban losing his mind?...

Let Us Now Read From The Book Of Dwyane
Christ loves basketball, of that we're certain. But there is no clue in the scriptures, as far as we can tell, as to which city Jesus would have preferred; Dallas or Miami. We can't really picture Him in either place, quite frankly. But we did find this over on Dave Barry's blog, so all of you Da ...

Howard's Boner (Or, Why Refs Are A Natural Male Enhancement)
Another reason that it would have been more fun to live in the early 1900s rather than now — also on the list: speakeasies, jalopies, no Internet — is the fact that they used the word "boner" to describe embarrassing mental missteps. We wish this were still true today; we'd have Buckner's boner, W...

Heat/Mavs Game Five: The Lack Of Stack
Game Five of the NBA Finals will serve as your capper to an excellent sports weekend. And there's certainly no lack of intrigue for tonight's game. The Heat have all the momentum. The Mavs can't stop Dwyane Wade and his myriad of injuries and ailments. Dirk Nowitzki has gone into hiding. Avery Joh...

Jerry Stackhouse And Common Sense Have Been Suspended
Jerry Stackhouse was found to be in violation of the NBA's strict "Do Not Touch Shaquille O'Neal" policy yesterday, as the league announced that it was suspending him for Game 5 of the NBA Finals. Stackhouse committed a hard foul on Shaq as the big man was driving for a lay-up. Have a look:...

Sadly, It Appears, Michael Jordan Is Back
So here's a scary thought for you: Imagine thinking of Michael Jordan the same way you think of Isiah Thomas right now....

And Here Come The Heat
As True Hoop pointed out this morning, this guy must feel like a complete idiot right now....

Hey, Remember These Guys?
Not to remain so firmly ensconced on the jock of Free Darko, but we're completely fascinated with their McSweeney's column today. Namely: Has anybody noticed that Antoine Walker and Jason Williams are playing in this series? Obviously, Dirk and Shaq and Wade and Cuban are the headliners of the ser...

Something Funny In Turkey
Completely bizarre story out of Turkey, a place where most bizarre stories all end up anyway....