Locker Page 187 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Deadspin Idiots Eat Gold Foods
I remember watching 2 Chainz eat a $295 burger on GQ’s “Most Expensive Sh*t” series and thinking, “hell to the naw.” $295 for a burger?! And you don’t even get fries with it! Of course, this was not a regular burger, but the “Le Burger Extravagant” from Serendipity 3. The burger consists of all the ...

The Sacramento Kings Are Done Waiting<em></em>
The Mavericks traded Harrison Barnes last night, in a transaction that chiefly made news because it happened in the middle of a game and later drew the ire of a man who has casually shipped out entire rosters of his teammates ahead of trade deadlines past. How could an NBA team, LeBron James asked, ...

The Eastern Conference Playoffs Are Going To Be Good As Hell
The Eastern Conference has been dogshit since I started watching basketball, and though the conference’s 2019 Finals participant will surely be skiing uphill in pursuit of a title, the three most significant trades of deadline week all featured Eastern Conference teams getting better by acquiring pl...

Nik Stauskas And Wade Baldwin's Wacky Trade Adventure Ends In Indianapolis
When this week began, Nik Stauskas was already playing on his third team in the past two seasons. Like, actually kind of playing: 15.3 minutes per game with the Portland Trail Blazers. Third-year guard Wade Baldwin IV, who was already on his second NBA club, played significantly less. It was not rea...

The Future Of Football Is A Lie<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....

Nothing Matters As Long As The Warriors Still Exist
While the rest of the NBA was playing hot potato with middling assets on Wednesday night, the Golden State Warriors decided to remind everyone that nothing matters, and that every NBA transaction from now until Kevin Durant decides where he wants to play next summer will be rendered meaningless by w...

Bring Forth The Trades
It’s NBA Trade Deadline Day, that day basketball fans all get extremely excited about each February despite it reliably sucking shit like six out of any seven years. The trade season already has produced many delights. Kristaps Porzingis to the Mavs, for poop! Otto Porter to the Bulls, for somehow e...

Look Who's Back!
The only thing that really matters about a catchphrase is that it gets said. The repetition is the meaning. Of course, by definition, We’re Back every time a new Deadcast arrives online. This is true if it’s Marchman and me and Lauren, or if it’s Marchman and Megan and Dom, or theoretically if it wa...

Kevin Durant Stops Ignoring The Media So That He Can Yell At The Media
Before the Golden State Warriors’ 141-102 win over the Spurs last night, it had been nine days since Kevin Durant had spoken to the media. Durant’s freeze-out coincided with the Kristaps Porzingis trade, and it was easy to conclude that he was trying to avoid being asked questions about his impendin...

Every NBA Trade Is Actually About Anthony Davis These Days
This is a Harrison Barnes blog right up until the point LeBron James makes sure it’s not....

Report: The Pelicans Invented A New Kind Of Tampering And Used It To Exact Sweet Revenge On The Hated Lakers
It looks increasingly like the Pelicans have no real intention of dealing with the Lakers ahead of tomorrow’s trade deadline. The Lakers have made their whole damn team available in offers for Anthony Davis, and the Pelicans apparently haven’t made any concrete counteroffers, and the only observable...

One Week After Declaring They Would Not Trade Otto Porter, The Wizards Trade Otto Porter For A Pile Of Trash
Almost exactly one week ago, Wizards owner Ted Leonsis mocked the very notion of his team trading any of John Wall, Bradley Beal, or Otto Porter, describing it as essentially a wacky, unworkable, and short-sighted fan theory....

There Is No Prize For Getting Under The Luxury Tax
The Heat and Pistons are currently eighth and ninth in the Eastern Conference, straddling the line between a playoff berth and a lottery berth, and separated by a game and a half in the standings. The East being what it is, it’s possible for a team to be very close to the playoff race and also very ...

Deadspin Up All Night: State Your Name And Business
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. More than halfway home....

This Is The Virginia I Remember
I was born and reared in Virginia and still hold fondness for the state as often as it embarrasses me and anybody who claims it. Times like these. That blackface/klansman photo that will end up getting the governor bounced was in a yearbook, after all, from a state school....
![Bobi And Tobi's Beautiful Friendship Survives The Clippers-Sixers Trade [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/hh9fz1xkxuznmi8m9z30.jpg)
Bobi And Tobi's Beautiful Friendship Survives The Clippers-Sixers Trade [Update]
By now you’ve heard about the blockbuster trade that sent Clippers great Boban Marjanovic to the Sixers in exchange for a quiver of picks and some rotation guys. Big Boban is on the move, but he won’t be alone. Bobi will head to Philly accompanied by his dear friend Tobias “Tobi” Harris, in a pairin...

The Sixers Are Going For It
The Philadelphia 76ers have acquired not-quite-all-star forward Tobias Harris from the Los Angeles Clippers, in a blockbuster trade first reported overnight by ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski. They’ll have the strongest starting five in the East, by miles—and, given the risks they’re taking, now had bette...

The Kristaps Porzingis Trade Had Been Building For Longer Than Any Of Us Realized
Last Thursday’s trade that sent a disgruntled (or at least mildly gruntled) Kristaps Porzingis to the Mavericks came as a shock to many around the league, not least among them Knicks fans. Where did this come from? Why did this happen so quickly? Why didn’t the Knicks shop around for better offers? ...

John Wall Imperils Several Perfectly Fine Ligaments Threatening JuJu Smith-Schuster Over Injury Joke
Steelers wide receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster gave some very mild business to John Wall over the particulars of his latest injury, which involved Wall rupturing his Achilles tendon while walking around his own home. Wall is no doubt in a sensitive state of mind at the moment, and he was not amused:...