Locker Page 190 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Let's Remember Some Guys: Mullets-Only Edition
If your hair does not touch your shoulders or your hair falls into your eyes, sorry, but you will not be featured on today’s episode of Let’s Remember Some Guys....

D'Angelo Russell And The Brooklyn Nets Are Actually Good Now
Quick: what’s the biggest joke of the decade in the NBA? If you answered, “the New York Knicks,” fine, I’ll give you that. But most people would answer, “that damn Brooklyn Nets-Boston Celtics trade,” and most people would be correct....

Joel Embiid, Who Is Joel Embiid: “I’m Joel, Joel Embiid”
The Sixers routed the LeBron-less Lakers last night, 121-105. It was kind of a weird game for Philly. Jimmy Butler played point guard. Ben Simmons played power forward. One thing was the same: Kendall Jenner was in attendance, improving the Sixers’ record to 12-2 when she’s there. ...

Spurs Win At The Buzzer, Get Crapped On By Gregg Popovich
The 11-42 Phoenix Suns are a putrid basketball team, and their purpose in the NBA ecosystem is to roll over every night and hand out career-best performances to opposing players who aren’t actually all that good. They are so bad, in fact, that just beating them by two points is grounds to get you a...

Jahlil Okafor, Of All People, Leads The Gutted Pelicans To A Road Victory Over The Rockets
The list of guys who couldn’t play Tuesday night for the Pelicans is very nearly a list of every established and half-decent player on the roster. This was a nationally televised game against the surging Rockets, and the lineups foretold an ugly, lopsided massacre:...

Deadspin Up All Night: Beg Your Pardon
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NBA Fines Anthony Davis For Self-Tampering In Public, Alarming Onlookers<em></em>
ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski reported Monday that the NBA was investigating Pelicans center Anthony Davis for self-tampering in front of God and everyone. Davis expressing (through his agent) the desire to be traded, on and all over the record, scandalized the Pelicans to the point that the team put ou...

Pro Cyclist Fined By Argentinian Police For Sexually Harassing Waitress During Photo Op
Veteran Belgian pro cyclist Iljo Keisse and his Deceuninck-QuickStep team are in Argentina for the early-season Vuelta a San Juan, and they have had an eventful past two days. Shortly after his teammate Julian Alaphilippe won the second stage of the race, Keisse found himself in trouble with local p...

Has Trump Seen Jared Naked?
Today we’re talking about Trump, Trump, Trump, Trump, and more....

God Help Us All, DeMarcus Cousins Is Fitting In Perfectly With The Warriors
For six months, Steve Kerr urged caution. Yes, DeMarcus Cousins joining the Warriors was a ridiculous coup, but Boogie’s recovery from an Achilles tendon tear was going to take time. Sure, the four-time all-star’s arrival in Oakland on a one-year rental represented yet another instance of Golden Sta...

Why Your Dumb Team Won't Trade For Anthony Davis
As you surely know by now, New Orleans Pelicans superstar Anthony Davis requested a trade. He wants to leave that derelict organization for one that will give him a chance to contend for championships. The Pelicans can deal him by next Thursday’s trade deadline, or they can wait until the season end...

Report: Anthony Davis Burns With A Desire That Can Only Be Satisfied By Joining The Lakers
After the flaming supernova that is Anthony Davis put in a trade request earlier this week, sending both the New Orleans Pelicans into panic mode and the rest of the NBA into a rabid frenzy, all that was left to discover was how Davis would go about exerting his considerable leverage to land in a pr...

I Went Backstage At The Puppy Bowl And Tried To Interview A Bunch Of Puppies
The Puppy Bowl began as Super Bowl counterprogramming. Everyone’s watching football, so why not just throw a bunch of puppies on the screen and call it a day? Somehow, that worked not just as filler but as actual programming. The Puppy Bowl airs Sunday for the 15th straight year....

Damn Paul Millsap For Ruining This Sweet Nikola Jokic Pass
The experience of watching the Denver Nuggets play basketball is often reduced to alternating between two distinct yet equally powerful emotions. The first is religious ecstasy, sparked through witnessing the soft god Nikola Jokic in the act of miraculous ball distribution. The other is anguish, bro...

Grizzlies Explore New Depths Of Misery Via Excruciating Kyle Anderson Meltdown
The Memphis Grizzlies spent the late stages of their Monday night home game against the Nuggets barfing away what had been a 25-point lead. Denver grabbed its first lead of the entire game with under a minute left in the fourth quarter; the teams traded buckets over the following 15 seconds (includi...

Lonzo Ball Would Prefer To Be Traded Where He Can Start Right Away, Just As I Would Prefer To Stalk My Enemies From Atop A Mighty Tyrannosaur
The Lakers are expected to offer some combination of young foundational players to the Pelicans in exchange for Anthony Davis, who requested a trade from New Orleans over the weekend. The most prominent of those young players is one Lonzo Ball, who by this time last year was viewed as the crown jew...

NBA Investigating Anthony Davis Trade Request For Signs Of Self-Tampering
Anthony Davis has requested a trade from the New Orleans Pelicans, a half-assed basketball operation that squandered all but a few hours of his NBA career to date. Adrian Wojnarowski reported it; he had the scoop because Rich Paul, Davis’s agent, told him. Just a few hours later, the Pelicans public...

Deadpsin Up All Night: The Same Party Every Weekend
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s do it....

The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Plank Fight
Sun Tzu probably had some quote about using the weapons you have available to you to defeat your opponent on the battlefield or whatever, and while I don’t know about any of that apocryphal bullshit, I can say with 100 percent certainty that these two ruddy English lads embody the spirit of resource...

The Laws Of War Are Still Trying To Solve The Quandary Of Legal Nukes
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....