Locker Page 787 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Coming Out Flat Is The Secret Disease Of All Sports
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

<i>Bloodsport </i>Is The <i>Citizen Kane </i>Of Pit-Fighting Movies
It's essentially impossible to make an Underground Pit-Fighting Tournament Movie that's not worth watching. The genre can support so many different interpretations, from beautifully shot middlebrow Hollywood striver story (Fighting) to all-flash juiced-up exploitation (Never Back Down) to foreign ...

Man Picks The Wrong Damn Door To Shoot
The NYPD is asking for help identifying a man who shot the hell out of a door in a Bed-Stuy apartment building last month. As you can see in the security footage above, the whole door-shooting thing didn't work out so well for this guy....

White Flight: The Knuckleheaded <i>Exodus: Gods and Kings</i>, Reviewed
1. I'm not sure who ever could have thought that Exodus: Gods and Kings was a good idea. Putting aside—only for a moment—the much-discussed "whitewashing" of the cast, the movie seems almost specifically designed to appeal to absolutely no one. It's a Bible story, but it paints Old Testament God as ...

Wizards Win On Bradley Beal Alley-Oop Layup With 0.8 Seconds Left
Bradley Beal still looks a bit off after missing the first three weeks of the season with a fractured wrist, but this is sure to raise his spirits. The Wizards entered the fourth quarter down eight to the Magic, but a furious rally led by John Wall tied the game on Rasual Butler's free throw with 16...

The Piggyback Bandit Has Found A New Stomping Ground
Newer readers, or those with faulty memories, may have forgotten about Sherwin Shayegan, better known as The Piggyback Bandit. Let us remind you. ...

Deadspin Up All Night: Sithi Uhm Ingonyama
Thank you for continued support of Deadspin. Craggs gon' Craggs....


Holiday Gift Guide: For Your Buddy Who Wants To Cook Like A Grownup
So your buddy or sibling or heretofore derelict life-partner has decided that now is the time to set aside a life of carryout and peanut butter sandwiches and become A Person Capable Of Cooking Meals At Home Like A Grownup. Good! Cooking at home is good....

Report: The Knicks All Hate Each Other
Stop me if you've heard this before, but the Knicks are a mess....

More Proof That Anheuser-Busch Hates You, Me, And Nature's Finest Fruit
Apples are the best fruit, because in addition to being delicious, they are also versatile. Apples can be juiced, pied, carameled, candied, fermented, distilled, cidered, crisped, jacked, brown bettied!, eaten plain without a fuss like you're some kind of goddamn health monster determined to live ...

Deadspin Up All Night: Stay Brave
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let's go....

Harvard Professor Wets His Dypie Over A $4 Overcharge On Chinese Food
A Harvard Business School associate professor ordered some food from a family-run Brookline, Mass., Chinese joint a few days ago; after reviewing his receipt, he noticed he'd been charged $4 more than the price he expected, based on the restaurant's online menu. And then, in a series of aggrieved e...

Chris Rock's Rock-Star Moment: <i>Top Five</i>, Reviewed
Chris Rock has such a warm, magnetic presence that it's baffling that he has never seemed that comfortable as an actor. Cutting and ferocious as he may be onstage, onscreen he often comes across as timid, like he doesn't belong. (It's telling that when I think of his film career, the first thing t...


TCU Got Screwed, And That's The Point
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering LeBron and Kate, toilet coffee, jar monkeys, and more....

Blake Griffin Was His Old Bad-Ass Self Last Night
One of the crappier things about the early part of this NBA season is that for much of it, Blake Griffin hasn't really looked like Blake Griffin. Too many Clippers games have seen Griffin floating around the perimeter, turning in uninspiring performances heavy on the mid-range jumpers and light on t...

Dogfish 120 Minute IPA Is America's Classiest One-Beer Buzz
I've been drinking irresponsibly lately, by which I mean all of the usual things, but also that I've been forgetting to use the stupid notebook in which I differentiate between beers with "strong grapefruit character" and those that merely display "pronounced citrus notes." I draw little trees next ...

Say Goodbye To <i>Sons Of Anarchy</i> And Its Lousy Soundtrack
One of the great benefits of watching pre-recorded television is that you can fast-forward through terrible theme songs, specifically "This Life," the atrocious roots-rock theme to the FX biker drama Sons of Anarchy. (There's an even worse Celt-ified version from the season partly set in Northern ...

Fuck The British Royal Family
His Royal Highness Prince William Arthur Philip Louis, Duke of Cambridge, Earl of Strathearn, Baron Carrickfergus, Royal Knight Companion of the Most Noble Order of the Garter, Knight of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle, Personal Aide-de-Camp to Her Majesty The Queen, looks like ...