Locker Page 812 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Foods That Taste Good But Aren’t Shitty For You: A Matrix
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering voodoo, Papa John, handcuffing, and more....

Report: Kings Owner Pitched A 4-On-5 Defense With One Cherrypicker
If you're a basketball fan, you've probably already read Zach Lowe's tiered NBA rankings. If you're not, toward the bottom there's an aside about a wonderfully wackadoo bit of proposed strategy that might turn you into a fan....

Rajon Rondo Says He's A Nap-Time Decision For Home Opener
Celtics point guard Rajon Rondo's status for Wednesday's season opener is still in question due to a broken hand he suffered after slipping in the shower. Rondo's hand is mostly healed, but there's still a chance he won't be able to go at tip-off. Naturally, people have a lot of questions about his ...

Evil Twin Hipster Ale Is Cool, Just Like You
Evil Twin is an interesting operation. In the unlikely event you have any free New York Times articles left on the 28th of a pretty newsy month, you can learn nearly everything I know about that operation here. A quick summary: It's a contract-brewing company run out of Brooklyn by a Danish guy who ...

Watch These Old People From The '60s Get Shitfaced To Wiz Khalifa
Here we have some cobbled-together footage of old white people getting hammered in the 1960s, cheekily set to "Black and Yellow" by Wiz Khalifa. ...

The Time JaVale McGee Had The Perfect Comeback For A Hater
I'll be honest, the NBA season kind of snuck up on me this year—I mean, would it be so wrong for basketball to just chill for a minute until the World Series is over?—but I officially got excited for the season while reading Nuggets point guard Ty Lawson's AMA on Reddit yesterday, because he reminde...

Warriors Owner Blames "Hoodish" Email On Autocorrect
Golden State co-owner Peter Guber has sort-of apologized for an team-wide email he sent yesterday in which he seemingly joked that he had to learn "hoodish" to speak to some Warriors players. And by "apologized," I mean "offered an excuse that makes no sense."...

Deep In The Heart Of Texas
If you don't know from Billy Lee Brammer and his brilliant novel about Dallas politics, The Gay Place, welp, here's your chance. Dig in to these two Texas Monthly features:...

Spelling Is Clearly Not A Priority On Florida State's Football Show
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Colt McCoy Tries To Celebrate Touchdown, Eats It
We need to talk about your celebrations, Colt....

Deadspin Up All Night: Me For You And You For Me
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Good times....

The 76ers Do Not Even Care Who Is On Their Team Anymore
The Philadelphia 76ers currently sport a roster that appears to be made up of guys who were spat into the world by NBA 2K15's player creator. According to the team's official site, the Sixers got a little more unreal today, as the team apparently signed 43-year-old power forward Bo Outlaw, who retir...

Just How Boozy Should Your Beer Be?
The very convenient truth about beer is that, if used as directed, it will often get you drunk. Thank god. There are so many great things that don't get you drunk: socks, coffee, shuffleboard, you name it; if its name isn't "alcohol," it doesn't get you drunk no matter how otherwise excellent it m...

Where Does Aaron Lewis's Rank Among The Worst National Anthems Ever?
Aaron Lewis, lead singer of Staind, butchered "The Star-Spangled Banner" ahead of last night's World Series game. He has since apologized, but he needn't; his rendition immediately goes down in history as one of the most memorable. ...


Dear America: Quit Flipping Out About Gluten
"A third of American adults say that they are trying to eliminate [gluten] from their diets," reports The New Yorker, in a long feature about our culture's weirdening relationship with this common protein composite. This is insane. Americans are insane....

Don't Freak Out About This Cryptic Kevin Durant Tweet, Thunder Fans
This morning, ESPN reporter Britt McHenry sent a tweet that seemed to contain her thoughts about the possibility of Kevin Durant eventually returning to his hometown and playing for the Washington Wizards:...

Darren Rovell Is Bad At Beer, Too
ESPN business reporter, kale enthusiast (see above), and staff snitch Darren Rovell likes to tweet about beer sometimes. I don't know if he gets paid for these tweets (I bet he gets paid for these tweets), but regardless, he recently declared Cigar City of Tampa, Fla., to be America's finest brewe...

Oh Nothing, Just Taylor Swift Hanging Out With Her Pals From The Knicks
Taylor Swift is the new Queen of New York, or something, so she went to Madison Square Garden to hang out with Carmelo Anthony and Amar'e Stoudemire. They probably talked about how great it is to be a New Yorker. In 20 years, graffiti murals of this image will grace brick walls throughout New York's...