Michael Phelps' Sacred Mission: To Sell Japanese Cars In China

Michael Phelps Inc.™® is returning to Beijing, this time to provide every man, woman and child with a brand new car. Expect gas here to be $9 per gallon by next year.

Phelps has been signed by Mazda to be their spokesman in the Greater China Region, where they're counting on him to boost their lagging sales.

In December, Mazda, Japan's fifth-largest carmaker, abandoned its 2010 sales target of 300,000 cars in China because of slumping demand and poor results at a venture with Chongqing Changan Automobile Co., the Economic Observer reported, citing Mazda's top China executive. Mazda sold 105,000 cars in China during the first 10 months of last year, it said.

Phelps signed a "seven figure" deal, according to a release by Dynamic Marketing Group's DMG Entertainment, which will develop an ad campaign around him. It is supposedly the biggest endorsement deal ever for a foreigner in China. He'll "exclusively endorse" the new Mazda 6, which I'd be much more likely to purchase if it were being endorsed by Usain Bolt or Danica Patrick.

Anyway, on behalf of the environment, the crude oil market and pedestrians everywhere, we thank you, Michael, for doing God's work. Perhaps you could work this into one of the commercials.

Phelps Signs Record Deal With Mazda [Universal Sports] Olympian Michael Phelps Returning To China To Endorse Mazda [Bloomberg]