Soccer Page 299 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Once Great, Now Unknown China Women's National Team
There was once a time when China were one of the biggest names in women’s soccer. A time when, come a World Cup, you could pencil the then-giants of Asia into the knockout rounds and rightly expect them to make a run. That time has passed. Now, no one really knows what to expect from this team....
Will Canada Earn The Right To Get Knocked Out By The USWNT Again?
The stage is set. Fresh off of their best-ever result in a major tournament (a bronze in the 2012 London Olympics) that climaxed with probably the sport’s greatest-ever game, Canada enter this summer’s World Cup on home soil turf with, as Beatrix Kiddo would say, some unfinished business. Unfortunat...
How Much Is FIFA Like <i>The Godfather</i>? ESPN And ABC Count The Ways
Josh Margolin with ABC News is reporting today that Sepp Blatter is a target of the federal investigation unveiled last week, which included the indictment of 14 international soccer leaders and businessmen. Those charges included some old-school classics familiar to anyone to who loves a good organ...
These Degenerate Emailers Want The Full Soccer Player Orgy Video, Please
Since we wrote on Sunday about the orgy in Thailand involving three Leicester City players, we’ve received a few requests for the full video, as if Deadspin is a subscription service hoarding soccer player orgies unless contacted by email. The inquiries:...
Sepp Blatter Will Resign
Sepp Blatter is no longer the president of everybody. The scandal-wracked FIFA head has announced he will resign, and a special session of congress will be held to elect his successor....
Arrested Ex-FIFA VP Cites <i>The Onion</i> In Strange Self-Defense Video
Today in Dumb FIFA Man, arrested ex-VP Jack Warner tried to thank his supporters and clear his name during a strange Facebook video in which he cites a report from The Onion to prove FIFA’s generosity. ...
![Leicester City Stars Film "Depraved" Orgy Featuring Racial Slurs [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/b9sl4h0xmpo1iulf7ejl.jpg)
Leicester City Stars Film "Depraved" Orgy Featuring Racial Slurs [NSFW]
Leicester City players James Pearson, Tom Hopper, and Adam Smith are under fire after video of a strange orgy during the team’s recent end-of-season trip to Thailand has made its way public....
FIFA Sponsors Double Down On Endorsement Of Slavery
If you expected this week’s sham re-election of Sepp Blatter after a massive federal corruption takedown to be the final straw in corporate slave sponsors’ relationship with FIFA, you have far too optimistic a view of the world. McDonald’s, Anheuser-Busch, Coca-Cola, Visa, and other FIFA sponsors ar...
Why Sepp Blatter Will Run FIFA Until He Dies
Toward the end of Sepp Blatter’s victory speech, delivered after riding out the biggest scandal of his career by having his emperorship validated in resounding fashion, the FIFA president looked into the camera and said “I like you.” ...
All Hail Sepp Blatter, FIFA Emperor-For-Life
As expected, courageous leader, tenacious progressive, and upstanding citizen Sepp Blatter has won re-election as president of FIFA. His impeccable credentials gave him the overwhelming victory over Guy Who Is Not Sepp Blatter, with the first vote ending up 133-73 before Blatter’s opponent generousl...
Will There Be Enough Votes To Oust Sepp Blatter?
In about five hours, while you are sleeping soundly, FIFA will begin voting in Zurich for its next president. The secret ballot will be held by the 209 member associations of FIFA, who each hold one vote, meaning that Maldives has the same voting power as Germany. In the first round of voting a cand...
How Many Ways Can You Hide A Bribe? The Best Of The FIFA Indictment
“There are some people here who think they are more pious than thou. If you’re pious, open a church, friends. Our business is our business.”...
Sepp Blatter Shocked, Shocked To Find That Bribery Is Going On In Here
In a statement released just now, FIFA president Sepp Blatter wants you to know that he’s just as concerned as you are about corruption in his organization. Corruption which comes as a complete surprise to him, and which he totally has nothing to do with....
IRS Goober Hits FIFA With A Tasty Burn
There were a lot of important things to discuss at today’s Department of Justice press conference about the corruption charges being brought against FIFA, but let’s worry about that stuff later. For now, we can focus on this dude from the IRS, who stepped up to the podium and unleashed hell:...
FIFA Says There Will Be No World Cup Re-Vote
As the Justice Department arrested or indicted 14 FIFA and media officials in dramatic early morning raids, Swiss authorities announced a criminal investigation of their own, into allegations of corruption and bribery related to the allocation of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups to Russia and Qatar. FIF...
Reports: Justice Department Brings The Goddamn Hammer Down On FIFA
According to reports in both the Wall Street Journal ($) and New York Times, a number of FIFA officials were just arrested in Zurich, Switzerland, and according to the Times are expected to be extradited to the United States where they will face charges of “wire fraud, racketeering and money launder...
FIFA Slaves Banned From Attending Relatives' Funerals
The 2022 Qatar World Cup will be brought to you by Coca-Cola on the backs of slave workers, many of whom hail from Nepal. These workers live in filth and work in terrifyingly dangerous conditions; their efforts to build the McDonald’s-funded event will result in one dead worker for every 90 seconds ...
Australian Soccer Chief Falls Off Podium At Trophy Ceremony
Melbourne Victory beat Sydney FC 3-0 last night to take Australia’s top soccer trophy, but all most Aussies will remember about the evening is 84-year-old FFA chairman Frank Lowy falling off the stage while trying to present the champions with their award....
Stadium Lied To; Fans, Players Cheer Title They Didn't Win
Strap yourselves in, because this story is batshit....