Soccer Page 353 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's What An Own-Goal Header Off An 80-Yard Assist Looks Like
You probably already know that Once Caldas and Itagüi Ditaires drew their Liga Postobón match at two goals each in Colombia this weekend....

Whenever Arsenal's Aaron Ramsey Scores A Goal, A Famous Person Dies
Since last May, Osama bin Laden, Steve Jobs, Muammar Qadaffi, and now Whitney Houston have all died in the days after Ramsey has scored. Spooky. [Fark]...

Zambia Won The African Cup, Leading To This Kerri Strug-Bela Karolyi Moment
Zambia stunned the Ivory Coast yesterday in winning the African Cup of Nations after a 17-minute 8-7 penalty shootout....

Cristiano Ronaldo Seals Hat Trick With Sublime Strike
You are unlikely to see as perfect a soccer goal as this for a very, very long time. Cristiano Ronaldo, who's hoarding goals at such a clip it's as if he's trying to make every Spanish soccer fan forget the name Messi forever, finished a natural hat trick against Levante with this shot, his 119t...

Manchester United Supporters Distribute Ku Klux Klan-Inspired Fanzine Before Match With Liverpool
Even before the non-handshake took place, tension was high at Old Trafford. According to police, the Manchester United fanzine Red Issue, being distributed before kickoff, featured "a Ku Klux Klan-style mask, with the words 'LFC Suarez is innocent' printed below." ...

Thierry Henry Slammed The Door On His Premiership Career With A Match-Winning Goal In Injury Time
Arsenal bounced back from a 1-0 deficit to steal a 2-1 win at Sunderland thanks to Thierry Henry's goal in the first minute of injury time. ...

Everton Upsets Chelsea 2-0 Thanks In Part To This Landon Donovan Assist
While fellow Yank Clint Dempsey keeps scoring goals (or at least inducing own goals) Landon Donovan is setting them up in a big way for Everton, and this play demonstrated some quality teamwork—from Phil Neville's challenge to Denis Stracqualursi's finish. [Fox Soccer]...

Clint Dempsey Is Still Scoring Goals, And This One Was A Tactical Nuke
Don't let this video frame fool you: Clint Dempsey is focused. The Fulham star continues to make his case for being the best American ever to play in the English Premier League, and this strike to put his squad up 2-0 on Stoke City was lethal. It's his 11th goal of the season. Sure, it may have te...

Luis Suárez, Fresh Off Ban For Being Racist, Refuses To Shake Hand Of Guy To Whom He Was Racist
Liverpool striker Luis Suárez, who returned this week from an eight-game suspension for racial abuse, showed he was a changed man when meeting Patrice Evra before today's Manchester United-Liverpool match. Ha-ha, no, he refused to shake the hand of the player against whom he allegedly abused in t...

80 Bucks Will Buy You A Chance To Name A British Soccer Stadium After Your Penis
Or your cat. Or your shoes. Or pretty much whatever you want. Bath City FC, of the Blue Square Premier League, is raffling off naming rights to its stadium, with almost no restrictions. All you need is £50, which converts to about $80. Those who enter will also receive four tickets to the April 9 ma...

Brazilian Soccer Team Locks Player In Hotel To Get Him To Lose Weight
Corinthians striker Adriano, who formerly played for Inter Milan, has really let himself go since having surgery on his Achilles last year. Until further notice, he'll only be allowed to eat what team doctors give him. [Guardian]...

Houston Dynamo Players Arrested After Fight With Off-Duty Cop Say Racism Was A Factor
Houston Dynamo players Tyler Deric and Warren Creavalle were arrested this weekend after a dust-up with an off-duty cop working security at a bar. From Deric's attorney: "Mr. Deric was with other soccer players, some who were African-Americans. The club did not want them coming in . . . He's not gui...

<em>Discover Wisconsin</em> And Other Things Your Fox Affiliate Is Showing Instead Of Soccer
There are 185 Fox affiliates in the United States, and most of them are showing today's heavily-hyped English Premier League match between Chelsea and Manchester United live. More than 20, however, are not. Here's what they chose to air instead....

Clint Dempsey Has Issued His Immediate Rebuttal To Landon Donovan's Rebuttal
Five minutes after we published this paean to Landon Donovan's performance thus far in the Premiership, Clint Dempsey responded with a strike that broke the gridlock and gave Fulham a 1-0 edge on West Bromwich Albion. It's Dempsey's seventh goal in the last three matches at Fulham's home Craven Co...

Landon Donovan Offers A Rebuttal To Clint Dempsey Fans Worldwide
From now until the end of the season, we'll be posting a number of clips from the previous weekend's English Premier League games. If there's a goal, save, dive, lip-read profanity, or hocked sputum we should know about, drop us a line at [email protected]. (You might also enjoy our better-late-than...

Here's Aston Villa's Ridiculous Own Goal That Put QPR Up 2-0
It's been another mediocre season for Aston Villa, and no play may characterize the struggles of the claret and blue squad than this play, in which Stephen Warnock cleanly lands a header directly into his own net. Villa landed a goal of their own late in the first half to cut QPR's advantage to 2-...

At Least Eight 40 70 People Killed After Egyptian Soccer Fans Storm Pitch (UPDATE)
Supporters of Egyptian side Al Masry invaded the field after today's 3-1 win over Al Ahly in Port Said, attacking Al Ahly players and security personnel. Al Jazeera is reporting that eight people have been killed and more than 60 injured. [via 101 Great Goals]...

Dan Borislow Told His Players To Call Him "Daddy," And Other Tales From A Miserable MagicJack Locker Room
We've told you all about Dan Borislow, the renegade owner who managed to bring down the whole of Women's Professional Soccer. His abusive, racist, sexist emails. His "Batmobile-like motorcycle." His complete inability to run a team, and his total unwillingness to market it....

Here's A Nifty Little Assist From An Egyptian Soccer Match Today
In today's Egyptian soccer showdown, Haras El-Hodood bested El Ettehad El Sakandary 1-0 on a this goal from Ahmad Hassan Mekki. But it was the trickery-fueled assist from Mohamed Tarek that truly bears mention....

A Madman Handcuffed Himself To The Goal During The Everton-Manchester City Match
We've no clue the protest this man is engineering (his t-shirt says something about Irish airline Ryanair) but the Everton-Man City match was put on hold for about five minutes as police attempted to unchain this hooligan from the goal. It's a good thing he chose the opposite end from Tim Howard;...